Feeling like a failure

Old 06-28-2010, 05:49 PM
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Originally Posted by traceymc1985 View Post
Ive been picking my brains to figure out why im feeling like this but all week ive eaten badly and had too many carbs and treats which has left me feeling low! Ive been really negative on myself and all ive done is cry for 7 days and then every night comfort eating infront of tv. Its just been a viscious circle that i havent yet figured out how to get myself out of it. Ive been looking in the mirror and there isnt 1 thing that i can find good about myself. Im 25 and feel i have the body of a 90 year old-2 children has left its mark on my body!
Comfort food and emotional eating are always a dangerous thing, but it's something that we have trained our body to do. When depressed, you want to reach for that cheeseburger because you deserve some comfort. It's also hard when our memories can be so strongly tied to food and comfort, like sitting around a big meal with the family or baking cookies with family. I know I ate to avoid having to process feelings that I was having. I could just chow down on a cupcake and focus on that instead of the pain I felt. I would feel better in the short term, but eventually the sugar crash would come and I'd feel crummy again. Not to mention the guilt of indulging like that and not process those feelings that will just sit there and wait until the next moment they can pop into my brain.

I've struggled with depression for years and antidepressants were only a temporary fix. I finally broke down and started seeing a therapist a year ago, and it is amazing how much better I am processing my feelings now. Journaling was a huge help. Writing down how I feel (like angry, guilty, unworthy, sad, etc) and writing down why I feel that way really helped me process them. Once I faced them & dealt with them, the cupcake didn't seem all that important anymore. I'm not saying I'm all the way there yet, but I am a different person than I was a year ago, and I think I can start tackling this weight thing head-on.

I would suggest, if possible, you consider some counseling or further look into why you reach for comfort food. I know counseling isn't a option for some people, so if you can, just reach for a journal & a pen whenever you're feeling down & in need of comfort food. Maybe by writing down your feelings & what is going on, it will help reduce the need for the food. I'm not saying it's going to get rid of it completely, but the more you do it, the more you can retrain your brain to think through those feelings rather than try to ignore them with food.

Originally Posted by traceymc1985 View Post
I know i can do better and im really going to try starting from when i wake up in the morning! Ive lost 64lbs since January 2009 and because ive stayed the same give or take a few pounds since January 2010 im feeling like im a terrible failure for not reaching my goal but i want the final 24lbs off before this christmas but it wont happen until i start doing something about it.
Congrats to you for making such huge strides already! 64lbs is amazing, and to keep it off is even better! Think of how far you've come. So many people give up right after they've started, but you've stuck it out once before. You can definitely do it again!
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Old 06-28-2010, 08:09 PM
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Something's been in the air for sure. My scale hasn't moved much lately and I know it's my own damn fault. Between having my daughter out of school and all this rain wreaking havoc on my joints, I haven't hit the gym in 2 weeks ><. The higher pain levels have me plain ol' wiped out and I just can't drag my butt out of bed early enough to do it. Haven't even gotten the kids out for a walk, thanks to the rain. I do well on eating during the week, but the weekends are killing me. Hubs is already on vacation, he has extra time this year, I'll be on vacation too after Friday. I guess at least the scale isn't moving up, but I can do better. I made a blackberry crumble yesterday with my daughter, her idea and she was sooo excited. Then she and my son both ate just the icecream, left the blackberry crumble, and my husband refused to even try it, so now it's either I eat the whole thing myself or waste 4 cups of fresh homegrown blackberries. I had some for breakfast with vanilla Greek yogurt, and it was good, within the plan but just a few minutes ago I was genuinely hungry. So I had a few slices of turkey, put that away, and there's that pan of crumble staring me in the face. I told myself I can have a bite. Well of course 1 bite turns to 2,3,4...and before I know it, I've had a whole serving. There goes my baked beans with dinner and I'll still be over by 150 calories. I think my brain's already up north on the beach, it's just so hard to try right now. I added my weight stats to my signature, maybe having that staring me in the face will motivate me.

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Old 06-28-2010, 08:41 PM
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Thankyou Lizzie- im definately going to start a journal and write down my feelings instead of using food. Im hopeful that it will help me figure out why i feel a certain way. Notebook on tomorrows shopping list already! I think i will find it really helpful and it helps that i love writing so much....why didnt i think of this before!! Excellent idea and writing will keep my head out of the cupboards and my mind will be focusing on something else. I suppose also it will help me find patterns in my moods and question why certain cravings come at different times of day or when im feeling in a particular mood. So its kind of like self-help which im guessing will be very refreshing.Thankyou again

Tracey
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Old 07-02-2010, 01:36 AM
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The visible signs of progress in a weight loss program are often very slow to come. Healthy weight loss takes time, but that can be very discouraging. Be encouraged to know that for each day that you exercise and eat healthy foods in moderate quantities, you have made progress. It might not be measurable that day, but you have made progress and it will be measurable over a period of weeks and months.

Keep records of your progress. Every day write down the positive changes you've noticed and also keep a record of the exercise you do every day. Write down what you did, how long you did it, and any thoughts about your exercise that day. Keep a running total of your minutes. You can look back at what you've done with a great sense of accomplishment and you'll be motivated to do more.
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Old 07-02-2010, 02:42 PM
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Tracy Darling, hope you are already past that feeling down part. you have accomplished so much already, so the motivation and the will power is there, just try to find it again. i know you are controlling what you eat during the day, but the downfall is in the evening, so, as someone else suggested, plan something for the evenings to keep yourself occupied. don't spend time in front of the tv if that is bringing the need for snack up for you. read a book, go for a walk, play some nice music that you want to dance to, do something to occupy your time and mind so you won't think of the snacks. there are so many good replies or suggestion here, that i don't think i can add to, but i also love Vickytoria's idea of keeping a journal and keeping track of your activities, so even if you don't see an immediate result, you know you have done good for your body and health and all. anyway, i just wanted to let you know we are all here for you. just know that you are a strong, motivated, sexy girl, try to remember that all the time and don't let anything get you down!
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Old 07-05-2010, 09:42 AM
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Tracey, I'm new here and notice your current weight and goal weight are the same as mine and within the same timescales so we're on the same bit of our journeys. I want to get to 140lbs by Dec and am 175lbs at the moment. I dieted a long time ago and lost the first 20lbs in the drop of a hat but the last 10, my word did it hurt. In the end I accepted that there was nothing for it but the classes at the gym and I forced myself to swim twice a week and it did the trick. I am now having to push again even harder as I'n now older and the weight is higher than last time! I'm trying to imagine myself buying size 10 clothes and putting trousers on and looking great and feeling comfortable. I wish you the absolute best for that last push
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