No-one understands!!!!!!!!!!

Old 06-21-2010, 01:12 AM
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@ Jaybrodz: I stand corrected. Thank you for providing the correct information.
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Old 06-21-2010, 01:14 AM
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I just wanted to add that YOU need to do what YOU think is best for YOU.

My man also told me that he didn't want me to lose weight. After we broke up I found out that he said it because he didn't want any other man to have any interest in me. I'm not saying that's the reason your man doesn't want you to lose anymore weight either. He probably got accostomed to your current body weight now and in his eyes your a hottie. But if you want to lose more and it's within a healthy range then go on ahead and make YOU happy.

And your mom and sis probably think you look amazing now also. But in the have to please you.

Best of luck and congrats on the weight you already lost!
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Old 06-21-2010, 07:00 AM
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hi gamegal, vicky, i completley agree all my sisters keep saying is that im getting more attention now with people saying how well i look. And as for my partner he seems upset all the time with me lately down to what i choose to wear, he definatley doesnt like the new attention. We went out on friday and i wore a dress which caused lots of friction between us but im not letting it stop me lose weight, if anything im more determined.
I think they are all slightly jealous of the new attention. I started jogging last week to tone up and asked if any of them would come but they wouldnt so im going alone. `whatever it takes`. thanx for the replys xx

Last edited by chezxxx; 06-21-2010 at 07:06 AM.
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Old 06-22-2010, 12:03 AM
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Default I understand

I totally understand what you are going through.. I come from and overweight family... and I have always been healthy and fit until I went on bc and then still got pregnant.. after three kids I decided it was time to get my life back. So I started exercising and watching what i eat.. at 5'6" and 175lbs.. my mom called me up one day and gave me this big story about how she is worried about me that I am too skinny and she is afraid for my health... I was sooo upset.. I have lost all my weight through calorie counting and exercise... I think she just feels bad for herself and turns that oin me
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Old 06-22-2010, 12:41 AM
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I get what you're saying, my family and spouse is the same way. They don't understand. My advice is not to worry yourself about whether or not they understand why you're doing what you're doing, as long as they are not trying to stop you, than do what you have to do for YOU, not for anyone else.
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Old 06-22-2010, 04:28 AM
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I came across this website that mentioned the tables (formulae) for goal weights; I think these were based (on their lower end, it seems) on the calculation Jaynie was talking about, and that was the one I always heard, too. While that works for some people, it doesn't work for everyone...scroll to the bottom to read the problems with this, not the least of which is that they are ancient: Met life ideal height weight tables references. The rest of the site is also really interesting, BTW.

Despite the problems, that's what I and a lot of others have in my head as "goal weight." However, I'm trying to branch out and look at things like a goal BMI and a goal body fat percentage as well. I think setting a goal weight is very hard, personally. I know that when I hit my goal weight and my body did not magically rearrange into wonderful proportions, I was underwhelmed. I continued to lose a little more on maintenance and so I guess this is my new stay where I am. My point is, don't put pressure on yourself to pigeonhole your weight into a certain number or range that someone else says is what it should should be the weight at which you feel healthiest and are healthiest; you can always ask your doctor to weigh in on it.

Bringing up the other topic. I hear what you're saying about family support. My hubs and son are extremely supportive and I'm so thankful. But I will be visiting family soon and I know I will hear from my mom that I'm too thin. Should I grab my still wiggly thighs and wave them at her? I keep trying to think of the one thing I can say that will not invite further comment. I am sure it is concern on her part. But the previous posters are right...sometimes it is jealousy and sometimes it is guilt on their part, knowing that they should be healthier than they are and feeling embarrassed that they aren't making changes. As long as you do what you know to be right for you and are honest with yourself about that, you can't go wrong.

Last edited by cjohnson728; 06-22-2010 at 04:46 AM.
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Old 06-22-2010, 03:55 PM
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In reference to significant others and comments about weight boyfriend is thrilled about how great I look (even overheard some of his employees saying how hot his g/f is..that would be me!). But at the same time, he has voiced concern that I'll get 'obsessed' with losing weight and might end up way too skinny and look gross. All I can do is let him know that such a thing won't happen and keep doing what I think is best. When I get to a place where I'm comfortable with my body no matter what, that's when I'll stop and start the maintenance journey.

My mother has already told me I need to stop losing, but I'm soooo much thinner than I've ever been, I think it's just a shock for her!
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Old 06-23-2010, 07:25 AM
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At last my boyfriend said how good i look last night, i had a very clingy dress on which i would never even dream of wearing before, but now it clings on all the right places. I couldnt believe it when he said it looked good, he did say though that he prefers me bigger (even though he thinks megan fox is hot and shes mega skinny lol) but at least he gave me a compliment. My mum went on holiday yesterday for two weeks so im going to realy be good this week and hopefully lose a bit more. I think i understand also why my mum and sisters are not being supportive. My mum is only 17 yrs older than me and the gap is even shorter if you count the way she dresses and looks, she definately doesnt look her age and we did everything together even night clubs, and my sisters are 22, 18, 16, they are all used to getting the attention and see me as a threat now, but i know they love me and they just need to get used to the way i am now. I spent so many years saying im on a diet and never lost anything that they all probably thought it would never happen.
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