Remember that he has grown up with these eating habits, and they are habits, even if they are bad habits. They are not so easily changed. With that said, it does not mean you need to fall into someone else's habits, build your own habits and fell good about that...My friend has the same thing going on in her house and she has been married now for about 30 years...she prepares the meals the way she wants to for herself and he cooks for himself. She prepares salads and light food and he throws on the stake and potatoes for himself. It seems to work. I am sure you can make it work too.

It doesn't look like the original poster is still here, but I will reply anyway for those who are. I am married to a sabateur. He does not have a weight problem and doesn't like healthy foods. He wants me to lose weight, but does little things to make bad foods available to me. Like buy junk food, then only eat a little bit and the rest is here to tempt me. Like make too much for himself, and leave it there for me to finish. The only thing I can do is leave it there and eat my healthy food. It's up to me to eat the food or not. If I leave it to be thrown out, eventually he will stop doing it. If I eat it, then he won. When I cook dinner, I make potatoes for him and I eat meat and veggies. We eat out often so we can each order what we want. We do not do fast food, just some local sit down restaurants. You can't make a person eat healthy if they don't want to, but you can set an example and hope that they will come around.

If you stick to your goals and your style of eating, and you lose the weight you want, that is a huge reward in itself. It's also a kind of triumph over his bad habits and sabotage tactics. Just keep that aspect out of conversations about food. It's not a competition unless you make it one.

We'll said Kathy!

To be honest, he's an adult. Let him cook his own greasy food and you can save your time to cook your meals. If he doesn't want to change his habits, he won't. Even if you force-feed him healthy meals, he'll go out and buy fast food whenever you're not watching.