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Old 01-11-2013, 07:31 PM   #142 (permalink)
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,271

Originally Posted by Mern View Post
Hope, I'm glad you posted about the argument with your daughter. We parents certainly don't have all the answers, but I must say that in my 36 years of parenting I can say in all honesty that the best any of us can do is to make the best decisions and actions according to the information we have at the time. And that's what you did in the obesity discussion with your daughter. I remember how I hated it when my Mom told me something for my own good--things that needed to be said and there was no other way to do it except to "tell it like it is" because she knew I was living in denial and headed down a path of self-destruction. It was hard to hear at the time, but eventually I came to accept that she was right and that I was the only one who could change my life to make it better. If the subject comes up again, just continue to reassure her that you said what you did, not to hurt her feelings, but because you love her and have her best interest at heart--for her to live a long, happy and healthy life. Huge Mom hugs to ya!
Thank you for this. She has told me that she hates when I tell her these things that she already knows or feels or hates about herself. She hates to feel she is disappointing me (ashe's not) or I am judging her (Hoenstly, in ways I am and in ways I am not.) But Mern, I have danced around this issue so as to try not to make her feel bad for years and it's just getting worse. I feel I had to as you say "tell it like it is" even if she hates me for it now. I know she and I have a bond that will not be broken by this and if this talk could give any impetus... it was worth it, worth her going back to school resenting me. But I don't fool myself. She has to not only want it but to be willing to put in the work to do it. Don't we all know that!!!

All that being said, I, of course, ate a "comfort" slice of pizza. I do not say I am the best example but I try.
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