I can relate...
Welcome to Fitday! This is a great place to come to if you want to lose weight. I've been using this site for years. I think the number one thing that got me to my goal weight is logging all my food and exercise every day.
I have to say it's really hard for me to respond to much of what you wrote. It really touched my tough old heart. My Dad was asking when I could come visit him, but I put that off, then he had a stroke. I rushed to his bedside, but he never made it out of his coma. It's hard to live with that memory, but I just try to focus on the good times we had together.
It was my Mom, however, that really motivated me to work on getting healthy. I realized that most of the problems she faced were due to a lifetime of being overweight. I realized that this is a fate I could change.
Not overnight, but over time. It's really hard at first, but soon you start feeling better, and better.
Unfortunately, I'm not in Ohio, so I can't be your work out buddy. I used to wish I had a workout buddy. When that didn't materialize, I even paid a trainer so I would be compelled to push harder (spending money is a big motivator for me). Then I started buying workout stuff I use in my house. That's what works for me - I don't have to plan, or get in the car, I just do it. (Hate how that term has been co-opted in ads!) Some days just once for 30 mins to an hour, sometimes for a few minutes a few times a day. For instance, I fold three bath towels, jump rope for as long as I can, walk it off while walking the towels to the linen closet, fold three more towels ....
Anyway, I hope you find a workout buddy, or at least will keep in touch on one of the 'Motivational' threads that pop up here weekly. There are lots of ideas on how to loose weight and keep it off here. I'm sure you will find your way.