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7-Day Motivational Thread 4/25/11

Old 04-27-2011, 02:04 PM
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Had a pretty successful day yesterday, foodwise... until I unearthed the secret stash of malted milk balls and peeps. Luckily for me, standard issue Brach's jelly beans were unavailable for a 50 mile radius of my home over Easter (...what the heck???) or I would have taken them down, too. lol


Food and Fitness:

* Eat clean and stay close to 1400 calories. Y, over by 10 malted milk balls and 2 peeps. lol
* Lots of water. Y, Y
* 3-4 fruits and veggies a day. 2, 2
* Limit breads and cereals. N, acceptable

Personal Goals:

* Must finish beading prom dress for Saturday!!! Today, 3 hours in; about 3 to go
* Take a break from spring cleaning this week. Taking today off... back's killing me. Y
* Learn to relax! Tell myself it's ok to sit quietly and read or do nothing at all. I don't have to be "accomplishing something" all of the time. Stop feeling guilty about taking time off. Finishing the dress, then taking the day off with a heating pad. (Haha... that didn't happen.) Looks like another busy day today.
* Present a positive attitude to others. Y, Y
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Old 04-27-2011, 02:45 PM
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Brach's were unavailable? Wow that is strange. I actually bought the jelly beans at the dollar store this year, which has been amusing and a little strange. They are all odd shaped, some are tiny and some are huge and some are clumped together, and all of them taste a little different than what we're used to, oddball flavors like lavender, rose and pink grapefruit.

cybervox, wow there is a lot more to your chicken tending then there ever was to mine. You don't mention a rooster. Maybe you need to introduce one to the flock in order to get the hens laying again? I dunno. We only ever raised Rock Island Reds and Legherns, (because those were the varieties that came free with the bag of chicken feed). We never called them by name, because once they stopped laying we called them "Sunday Supper". I did have a friend that raised all sorts of exotic varieties, and I used to love to see all the different egg colors his birds produced. Recently I started buying my eggs at the local fabric store. The owner raises several varieties of chickens (usually 4-5 different colors in each box of eggs) and she sells them by the dozens at a really good price. I had forgotten just how much better farm fresh eggs taste, I don't think the chickens that lay the eggs for the grocery store get quite enough to eat.

Last edited by almeeker; 04-27-2011 at 03:06 PM.
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Old 04-27-2011, 02:57 PM
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I know! I found them a month or so before Easter, but then they disappeared. I must have gone to 9-10 stores. I could find the spiced ones, but not the traditional. It was a major catastrophe in my house!
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Old 04-27-2011, 03:04 PM
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jj: super-kudos on the donating blood! What a great type of milestone to have! Getting fit helps more than just you!

Cassie: FitDay for finances sounds like a plan. You're completely right, people bring different kinds of money baggage/stress/ideas to the table, and I think every couple or household finds their own way that tries to balance and not step on toes!

Mai: Sorry to hear that it's stressful for you too It sounds like you two are on different pages when it comes to what's expected of your finances -- you say you're expected to save, whereas it seems like he wants you to contribute to bills? Which is it? If it's both, you need to talk about that, and if it's one or the other, you need to talk about that too. Impulsive spending (where he buys with whatever surplus you guys get) is a familiar problem to me - a budget is needed, and he needs to STICk to it!

Mern: I'd be jealous of him too! Don't you hate it that guys tend to lose more easily? Bah! I hope you just keep right on huffing and puffing, and he can deal with it! And hey, thanks for calling me mature! I try to work on it. I've been a relatively high-anxiety person my whole life, and the only thing I've really learned is that running, hiding, screaming, pounding my fists, binging, starving myself, and depressing myself all DO NOT WORK in terms of dealing with the stress. I have a hard time being confrontational, but dealing with it makes it go away. Period. Nothing else works. So I just have to make myself do it, and make myself follow a plan if need be. Thanks for the encouragement!

Mike: I hope there are good things for you on the money horizon -- I am crossing my toes for you as we speak

quinn and almeeker: Ideally, I'm with you ladies - I'd love a joint checking account, and I've brought the idea up to BF. What it boils down to, I think, is that he NEEDS a little bit of financial independence right now, without me able to see every little purchase he makes on the bank statement. He jumped into living with me when he was still a teenager (eek! It sounds so weird to say! It's legal!! He was turning 19!) and he never had that period of living on his own and playing with money. So for now, we're seperate. I think if and when we get married, joint will be the way to go. So far, "his" and "hers" bills are working out well for us. It's not the bills and necessary expenses that are the problem for me, it's saving for the "other" stuff.

almeeker: BOO TO DH! Ugh. I have to play a bit of devil's advocate -- did he KNOW it was Mother's Day he scheduled you for? I know the men in my life can be clueless about anything that's not a birthday or Christmas...sometimes they forget. Or maybe could it be part of an elaborate scheme to make you THINK you're working but then actually not? >.> (A girl can dream)

Cybervox: YAY FOR AKI!! I do hope she's feeling 100% better soon. It's a testment to the love and care you've given her

Tuesday Report Card

Food, Exercise and Lifestyle Goals:
1) Achieve a 7,000 calorie deficit by the end of the week M: -701 T: -786 (Week Total: -1487)
2) Do not take off two days in a row from exercising. M: Day off, though I did go grocery shopping T: No gym
3) Achieve a 30% protein average for the week M: 38% T: 24% (Weekly average: 31%)
4) Carbs at or below 50% average for the week M: 38% T: 56% (Weekly average: 47%)
5) Protein powder after every workout in a smoothie M: N/A T: N/A
6) At least 104 oz. water daily M: yes (120) T: yes (112)
7) Report here each and every day M: Day after T: Day after
8) Eat out/take out no more than twice for lunch and once for dinner M: Had take-out for lunch T: No takeout (Lunch Total: 1 Dinner Total: 0)

Other Life Stuff:
1) When stressed, don't take it out on myself, or anything that does not have to do directly with the source of the stress. Deal with it directly, even if I don't want to. M: Yes! T: Big yes!
2) Make an effort on my appearance every day M: Yes T: yes
3) Work on my embroidery for at least five hours M: 1.5 hours T: No (Week Total: 1.5 hours)
4) Don't worry, be happy! M: Mostly T: Stressful morning, much better evening
5) Try two new recipes for dinner M: not yet T: tomorrow

I worked semi-late last night as I was "on a roll" with what I was doing, and you never want to stop when that happens! I got home to BF having cooked a very nice dinner - some whole-wheat pasta, grilled chicken, and a semi-homemade alfredo sauce (a recipe I've been tinkering with that he got out of my cookbook) and wine. I had texted him to warn him that I was stressed (part of my do-not-take-it-out-on-other-people mitigation plan!) and he wanted to help me relax. It was very sweet and VERY uncharacteristic (he's usually not so romantic). So we ate a leisurely dinner and talked about a money plan. I didn't get to the gym, but it felt like it would be a bad thing to say "Thanks for the dinner, honey, off to sweat now!" I'll make up for it in the rest of the week!

I do feel much less stressed today now that we have a plan in mind, and the inspection has passed this morning. I think we did okay. Don't have too much time to expound as I need to get back to work, but I hope everyone has a great Wednesday!!

~Terri
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Old 04-27-2011, 03:24 PM
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Originally Posted by taubele View Post
almeeker: BOO TO DH! Ugh. I have to play a bit of devil's advocate -- did he KNOW it was Mother's Day he scheduled you for? I know the men in my life can be clueless about anything that's not a birthday or Christmas...sometimes they forget. Or maybe could it be part of an elaborate scheme to make you THINK you're working but then actually not? >.> (A girl can dream)
He knew, and not only did he know that it will be Mother's Day he also knows that I've been taken for granted by this same individual many many times before and that it really pisses me off. He also knew that I had already said "no" to watching the kid on Mother's Day (which is why the individual asked him and not me). I haven't yet decided how I'm going to handle it. I have some ideas, one - I could ask him to undo it (although I've already suggested such and was told no), two - I can make other plans for myself that involve leaving him home alone with 4 kids (while I go out and spend money and hit him where it hurts), three - invite a couple of kids over for the weekend of his birthday, specific kids, the ones that really drive him nuts. I do need to sit down and talk this over with him, the hard part is that as soon as I open my mouth my anger just escalates out of control and he turns into a clam. Communication is not exactly our strong suit.

Terri, very jealous of your nice dinner with the BF, maybe that's what DH and I need is some time alone together.

Last edited by almeeker; 04-27-2011 at 03:26 PM.
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Old 04-27-2011, 03:26 PM
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Tuesday report:

Calorie limit 1600 1297, 1573
Calorie deficit 1037 (I include exercise calories burned) 1399, 1076
Carbs less fiber limit 35g 17.9, 24.8
Protein target 120g 125.3, 161.5

Artificial sweetener limit 1 pk. per day 0, 1
Sugar free candy limit 1 piece per day 0, 0

Water 64 oz. YES YES

Exercise 1/2 hr. 6 days YES YES
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Old 04-27-2011, 04:02 PM
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Originally Posted by almeeker View Post
He knew, and not only did he know that it will be Mother's Day he also knows that I've been taken for granted by this same individual many many times before and that it really pisses me off. He also knew that I had already said "no" to watching the kid on Mother's Day (which is why the individual asked him and not me). I haven't yet decided how I'm going to handle it.
Just wondering... why doesn't the mother looking for the sitter want to be with her child on Mother's Day???

I'm with Cassie. In a calm and "I'm in charge" tone, tell him that you are very sorry that he didn't clear it with you first, you are unable to help him, suggest that MIL does it and tell him that you wish to spend quality time with your own children, privately, that weekend.

...and suggest that the mother of the child should do the same!


...or take your children to a nice hotel with a pool for the night (tell him it's your Mother's Day gift) and leave HIM alone with babysitting duties. I guarantee, he'll never do it again.
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Old 04-27-2011, 04:44 PM
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almeeker, I'd be pissed as well! I like quinn's second idea.

Terri, Thanks for crossing your toes for me.

Well, I have an issue... (not quite sure if it's an injury). I've had a pain in my hips (where your ovaries are... not mine). I think I felt this on Sunday before starting P90X. Well last night I couldn't sleep comfortably and today my back is stiff. Damn it sucks being old. I'm not sure if I'm going to count this as an "injury" for my goals.

Last edited by 01gt4.6; 04-27-2011 at 04:47 PM.
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Old 04-27-2011, 04:46 PM
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Originally Posted by almeeker View Post
He knew, and not only did he know that it will be Mother's Day he also knows that I've been taken for granted by this same individual many many times before and that it really pisses me off. He also knew that I had already said "no" to watching the kid on Mother's Day (which is why the individual asked him and not me). I haven't yet decided how I'm going to handle it. I have some ideas, one - I could ask him to undo it (although I've already suggested such and was told no), two - I can make other plans for myself that involve leaving him home alone with 4 kids (while I go out and spend money and hit him where it hurts), three - invite a couple of kids over for the weekend of his birthday, specific kids, the ones that really drive him nuts. I do need to sit down and talk this over with him, the hard part is that as soon as I open my mouth my anger just escalates out of control and he turns into a clam. Communication is not exactly our strong suit.

Terri, very jealous of your nice dinner with the BF, maybe that's what DH and I need is some time alone together.
Well that just sounds terrible, like you're even being punished somehow. I'm totally with telling him that you absolutely, positively cannot do it, and that you're hurt that he would do something like that against your knowledge. Cassie and quinn are spot-on. Leaving him with the children sounds like a really great plan, honestly. "You agreed, so you do it."

Sorry to hear that it's such a mess, and I didn't mean to make anyone jealous! Would it help if you write down what you want to say and read it? I've totally done that before because I tend to get super-emotional and weepy, so I leave a note, or read off of cards. Sounds corny, I know, but it does help keep me more even.
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Old 04-27-2011, 05:55 PM
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Originally Posted by quinnesec View Post
Just wondering... why doesn't the mother looking for the sitter want to be with her child on Mother's Day???

I'm with Cassie. In a calm and "I'm in charge" tone, tell him that you are very sorry that he didn't clear it with you first, you are unable to help him, suggest that MIL does it and tell him that you wish to spend quality time with your own children, privately, that weekend.

...and suggest that the mother of the child should do the same!


...or take your children to a nice hotel with a pool for the night (tell him it's your Mother's Day gift) and leave HIM alone with babysitting duties. I guarantee, he'll never do it again.
Basically she doesn't want to be with the child any of the time, Mother's Day is no exception. She signed up to run in a race that day, she invited me to go with and I said "no way, I don't run anywhere for anybody on Mother's Day". Her response was "Oh that's Mother's Day?". DH was sitting right there when we had this conversation. And the last time she dumped the little dude with me, she was gone for 10 hours, she didn't even ask me to watch him, she just left, and I was the only adult there. Lucky me. That was 3 weeks ago. I'm calming down, and I have a new plan. They are coming over the night before, so I'm going to suggest that DH and I go on a date and she can stay at our house and take care of our kids, I think that's a very fair compromise. Then I'm going to get rip roaring drunk and sing as we trip back into the house after midnight.

Last edited by almeeker; 04-27-2011 at 05:59 PM.
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