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Just starting blues!

Old 08-03-2010, 03:45 AM
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Unhappy Just starting blues!

So, I've been overweight all my life, never once been in the "average" range for my height, and always had a grudge against the world because of it. I guess that means it's time to change me, and not everyone else, huh? Well, about 9 years ago I had a gastric bypass surgery. I have managed to keep off just over 100 lbs, but to reach that "normal" range, I still have about 100 left. I did initially get down further, but what they say is true: You can change the body, but if you don't change the mentality it won't do any good.

That would be why I'm here. I'm sick of waiting to get the support I need at home. With an overweight husband, who LOVES to eat, and other family who are supposed to eat healthy on doctor's orders and still don't, what's a girl to do? I guess that's why about 5 days ago I made up my mind to change things. I'm thrilled with my decision, but stressed to the max trying to make things work!!! (Oh, to top things off, I've decided to quit smoking after 16 years of the horrible habit, too). I guess I figured since my 30th birthday was coming up (today!) I was sick of being who I was.

Now, my question is, how do I do this? I mean, I understand the aspects of eating properly, counting calories, etc (and I'm even starting to enjoy it a little ) But how do you take a 30 year mentality and turn it around? I hate to be a downer for anyone, but I courld really use some advice.
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Old 08-03-2010, 04:42 AM
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Happy birthday!! Turning 30 is a big deal!! You are right, it is absolutely a mind-set. No one can make you eat right. You have to WANT to. You came to the right place for tips on eating. I love using the food journal. I also read these forums to find ideas on food. I have done other diets, so I have a starting point of which foods I *should* be eating.
Stay strong!! It can be tough when you are surrounded by people who are not eating healthy foods.
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Old 08-03-2010, 05:09 AM
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Kudos to you for deciding to quit smoking. Thats the biggest thing you can do for your health. Since you're trying to do a major change on several fronts, smoking, eating, exercising, etc... I suggest you take it slowly and set mini, attainable goals to start. If you have a bad day, just resolve to be stronger again the next day!!

Even without much support around you, if you do it for yourself and your health you will succeed.

Good Luck to you and Happy Birthday!
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Old 08-03-2010, 09:42 AM
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Happy birthday and welcome to the forums! Sounds like you have the knowledge you need to be healthy but need some motivation, especially with what you've got going on at home!

I totally agree with hetemte about setting mini-goals for yourself. If you set out to change too much too quickly, failure is likely if not inevitable. Start small. Make it a goal to get through one day without a cigarette. Try to get at least 3 servings of fruit and vegetables every day for a week. Drink at least 8 glasses of water by the end of each day. Pick one or two that you think will work for you, and focus on reaching those goals. Let everything else go. You don't have to be Superwoman! =)

Once you accomplish those goals, reward yourself! If you go a day without smoking, give yourself a pedicure or take a nice relaxing bubble bath. If you eat your fruits and vegetables for a week, see a movie you've been wanting to see (minus the popcorn, of course!). If you drink all of your water for a week, go to the library and find a book to lose yourself in or buy that cute handbag you've been admiring. Find rewards that work for you, but make sure they're not food-related. They can be free or expensive, just as long as it's something you'll work towards!

If you don't reach a goal, that's okay. Start over. Not on Monday or next week or next month. Start over right now, at 5:36 pm on a Tuesday evening. Put the past behind you. One of the best quotes/pieces of advice I received about healthy living has to do with this: If you got a flat tire on your car, you wouldn't fix it by slashing the other three, right? Of course not! So if you smoke one cigarette, don't give in and smoke the whole pack! Or if you eat a few chips, don't demolish the whole bag! Try again. You'll get there eventually. The only way you won't succeed is if you quit trying!

Once you've mastered the first few goals you set for yourself, set a few more! Set a calorie range that you want to stay in between. Make it a goal to exercise at least 30 minutes a few days a week, even if it's just a walk or dancing in your living room. It's amazing what small, achievable goals can do for you!

To summarize: Set goals. Work hard to reach them (and get the support you need here on the forums!). If you mess up, try again. Reward yourself! Set new goals.

I hope you've had a great birthday. Best wishes as you take off on this journey!
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Old 08-03-2010, 12:02 PM
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For me my motivation didnt really start till I started seeing results. Just keep at it for a couple weeks, once you start seeing the pounds coming off you'll enjoy it a lot more. Good luck!
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Old 08-03-2010, 03:15 PM
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Happy birthday Twins, and welcome to FitDay. =)

I can relate 100% to what you stated about never being in the 'average-for-your-height' category. I've always been overweight, since birth. BUT, I refuse to let that stop me from trying to get fit & healthy. Now that I'm in my 40's, the health issues are really starting to catch up to me.

I remember my 30th birthday well. It was a difficult one to face. I had hoped to be 'skinny' by then, and I had just quit smoking too. I'm happy to say I've stayed tobacco free since then, and it does feel great! I never realized how much it smelled on my clothes and in my house, and the minute you quit, your body starts the healing process. So great job!

Now, for weight loss motivation -- you have to find goals, both short & long term that are meaningful to you. Maybe it's to look good for a special event? To fit into an old pair of jeans? To not wheeze while playing with your kids?

Since I've never been thin, I admit it is hard to visualize myself there at times, but even though I've yet to reach that goal... I know it will come.

I wish you lots of success on this journey! Hope to see you post more soon.

Best always,
Smoosh
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Old 08-04-2010, 03:01 AM
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I just want to say thank you to everyone. It's so nice to know that someone out there feels the same way you do, especially when you feel so alone in your thoughts! I think it will be great to have you all around as I go through this journey. The support here is wonderful. And thanks for the birthday wishes-it was a good one (minus the one piece of chocolate cake--oops!). Guess that means more exercise today, but with such encouraging words from you all, it should be easier.

By the way, the comment about getting a flat tire--genious. I know I will think about not slashing those other tires every time I have a little slip.

Have a wonderfully healthy and happy day all of you!!!
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Old 08-04-2010, 03:07 AM
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My boyfriend is overweight like your husband and LOVES to eat food. He's 6'2 360 pounds. I will admit it is difficult to eat healthy while my boyfriend devours everything in sight...ie he can and WILL eat a party size pizza in one night while I watch in amazement.

What I've come to realize is that you are only responsible for yourself and what goes into your own personal body. My boyfriend desperately needs to loose the weight per doctors orders, but untill he DECIDES to actually make a change to loose weight nothing will help. Nothing I can say or do will help until he makes the decision to change himself.

In the meantime, try to resist the urge to eat that pizza he might be munching on or anything else not healthy.

I recently watched a news piece that someone is 70% more likely to keep up with loosing weight once started on a weightloss journey if they use a website like fitday to keep up with logging food, exercise and seek advise on the forums. So if you ever need us, WE ARE here and WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME BOAT AS YOU!
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Old 08-04-2010, 04:34 AM
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Originally Posted by twinssunrise
I just want to say thank you to everyone. It's so nice to know that someone out there feels the same way you do, especially when you feel so alone in your thoughts! I think it will be great to have you all around as I go through this journey. The support here is wonderful. And thanks for the birthday wishes-it was a good one (minus the one piece of chocolate cake--oops!). Guess that means more exercise today, but with such encouraging words from you all, it should be easier.

By the way, the comment about getting a flat tire--genious. I know I will think about not slashing those other tires every time I have a little slip.

Have a wonderfully healthy and happy day all of you!!!
You SHOULD have had a piece of cake on your birthday! Otherwise you probably would have felt deprived! You've got the right attitude about getting some exercise to make up for it today. You go, girl!

Glad you like the tire quote. I can't take credit for it, but I can share another one: If you broke one egg in a carton, you wouldn't solve the problem by breaking the other 11, right? I can't take credit for that one either, but I think of them often when I slip, and I hope they help you, too!
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Old 08-04-2010, 06:07 AM
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This has been very helpful. Motivation is a pitfall for a lot of people. Having other's advice on how to keep thinking positivlely is great! I loved reading thru this thread. Thanks for the uplifting quotes and wisdom!!! Happy Day everyone!
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