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Marvelous May in the 100 plus womens thread

Old 05-20-2010, 03:05 AM
  #91  
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Originally Posted by SkinnyErinn
Yesterday was a rough day for me as well... I found that if I put myself out there and told folks that I was having a bad day that SOMEONE SOMEWHERE would lift me up... and they did. My bestiest best friend texted me the following: "To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe." - Anatole France.
My family is getting sick of me too... but, I was MORE sick of myself at my biggest - so they can just friggin' deal as far as I am concerned. I'm tired of their constant obsession with having groceries in the house and me in the kitchen cooking... but I put up with THAT! Lol
Oh thanks, you made me laugh and I needed that! I have an 11 year old who acts like she's the center of the universe, she needs to lose 30 pounds and refuses to listen to it. Throws an absolute fit when I talk about my efforts because she thinks I'm telling her how she needs to be--which I'm not, just trying to keep my journey uppermost in my mind.

It's hard have a teen and pre-teen in the house and finally taking time/effort for ME for a change. DH is incredibly supportive and always has been, and so is my oldest, but that 11 year old...There are days that I'd like to pay someone to take her.
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Old 05-20-2010, 03:14 AM
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Originally Posted by montanacricket
Oh thanks, you made me laugh and I needed that! I have an 11 year old who acts like she's the center of the universe, she needs to lose 30 pounds and refuses to listen to it. Throws an absolute fit when I talk about my efforts because she thinks I'm telling her how she needs to be--which I'm not, just trying to keep my journey uppermost in my mind.

It's hard have a teen and pre-teen in the house and finally taking time/effort for ME for a change. DH is incredibly supportive and always has been, and so is my oldest, but that 11 year old...There are days that I'd like to pay someone to take her.

Kids... arg. You give them life, you give them your body, your blood, sweat tears and your best years. They can't even give us the time of day. My mom was extremely obese, she was over 500 pounds as I was growing up. Weight was NEVER spoken about... so as I creeped up to 200, 300 and 400 myself, it was never mentioned... no one showed any concern. I often wonder how my weight would have been if I had a great role model who was working on her health as I was growing up. Your daughter will come around. As an over weight kid, she probably gets a lot of grief at school - so it's important for her to feel safe and accepted at home. I know you are absolutely doing that! It's just that she's got to feel really defensive at the end of the day. Just keep providing her that excellent role model and when she is ready (may take her years!) she will come around. But the food changes are already benefiting your family! Stay strong sister!
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Old 05-20-2010, 03:16 AM
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Originally Posted by SkinnyErinn
Kids... arg. You give them life, you give them your body, your blood, sweat tears and your best years. They can't even give us the time of day. My mom was extremely obese, she was over 500 pounds as I was growing up. Weight was NEVER spoken about... so as I creeped up to 200, 300 and 400 myself, it was never mentioned... no one showed any concern. I often wonder how my weight would have been if I had a great role model who was working on her health as I was growing up. Your daughter will come around. As an over weight kid, she probably gets a lot of grief at school - so it's important for her to feel safe and accepted at home. I know you are absolutely doing that! It's just that she's got to feel really defensive at the end of the day. Just keep providing her that excellent role model and when she is ready (may take her years!) she will come around. But the food changes are already benefiting your family! Stay strong sister!

You just defined her whole personality with that statement!

Thanks so much to you and to everyone for all the encouragement. I know that you ladies are the one's who are going to help me get there!
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Old 05-20-2010, 03:23 AM
  #94  
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Morning everyone
This is a long weekend here in Canada this weekend and dh will be home after being away for 2 weeks...so i may not be around much.
Was supposed to go for an extra walk last night outside but it ended up storming here so we had to bail..but will try again soon.

Erinn thats what good friends are for...thats great you reached out instead of eating your stress! good going...
Montana I can obsess and talk and talk about this healthy way of living as well...my walking partner is right on board with me as well so we often talk as we walk, I like that as much as the walking.
Almeeker and Christine on the food journal if I have somthing over and over again I make up a custom food and enter the calories for it...(such as my spag squash.).I figured out the calories per serving and saved it..so now when I eat it I dont have to figure out the calories for each item in the dish..I just look under the custom food. and enter it,,,,can you do something like that in the activities tab??
Egm looks like you did well with the buffet..great going

Ok ladies Im going to post a new challenge thread for the weekend now so I dont forget...lets make this weekend count!
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Old 05-20-2010, 07:21 AM
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Almeeker - Holy Calorie Burn, Batman! I take it you got more of your veggie garden done? I have to say I'm very jealous (despite the hard work I know it takes) - I wish I could have one but we don't have enough sun in our yard with all our large trees.

Montana - Jogging! That's awesome! Keep pushing yourself, girl!

Erinn - You're very lucky you have such supportive friends. Hopefully that makes up (not totally, but at least a little) for the lack of support you got from your family. And do I now see that you only have to lose 10 pounds 11 times?? Way to go!

Patti - Thanks for starting the weekend thread - that helped alot last weekend!

As for me, that goofy 2 pounds was gone today (back down to 227) and Aunt Flo unpacked her stuff to stay for the next 4 days or so. Sometimes it does feel really good to blame something/one else entirely for the number on the scale! Today is just an average day, although I am spending some time in the car. Going to stop at a gas station on the way home and grab a big iced tea - but no candy!
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Old 05-20-2010, 11:09 AM
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Default hey everyone

justgetting caught up on all the posts- great job everyone on working through some tough days and staying on track.

cc1158 - I know how you feel I started this journey at 305lbs and didn't want to exercise much, but as I have lost the weight - now down to 245 I feel so much better and actually look forward to walking and doing some exercise videos now. It helps to start small, do what you can, and build on that day by day. find something you like to do or get a walking buddy if you can. I "drafted" two other girls in my office and we walk 20 minutes on our lunch hour now - that way we push each other to go and not make an excuse.

montanacricket- rest is very important to dieting, it has something to do with the body chemistry and if we do not get enough rest it can slow weight loss.

patti- so glad you are feeling better, everyone has off days, but you are certainly one that has inspired me and I'm glad you posted and shared your struggle and your triumph !

looking forward to the end of the work week, tired tonight and can't wait to have some time to relax and hopefully enjoy the outdoors this weekend.
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Old 05-20-2010, 03:13 PM
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Originally Posted by egmdobbs
Erinn - You're very lucky you have such supportive friends. Hopefully that makes up (not totally, but at least a little) for the lack of support you got from your family. And do I now see that you only have to lose 10 pounds 11 times?? Way to go!
Yup yup - three pounds this week... just keep swimming, just keep swimming.
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Old 05-20-2010, 10:18 PM
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Morning ladies. I tried to post last night but I was soooo tired that everything I wrote sounded really bitchy. So I gave up and went to bed. Feeling much better this morning. Great job everybody on dealing with different issues and staying on track.

montanacricket, sorry to hear that your 11 year old DD is sometimes a handful. I have 3 girls and they are all difficult in their own ways. Our oldest is also a little heavy, maybe 12-15 pounds more than she should be. At Christmas she weighed 94 pounds, which for her height was overweight. I've not put her on a diet, but we discuss healthy options vs. unhealthy options all the time. She's also playing sports and I've gotten rid of all the really unhealthy snacks in this house. Since doing that she's lost 5 pounds and her waist is 4" smaller. I only measured her waist to order her team swimming suit, but this swim season her suit is 2 sizes smaller than the one I ordered for her in December. And none of her pants stay up either. So my suggestion would be to make changes in your house that she either can live with or doesn't notice and to get her involved in something fun that also happens to burn calories. I've been very subtle with my daughter and so far it's working really well. Of course my DD isn't the defensive sort, she's more of the bossy know-it-all sort, gotta love her for it though, she got all that from her mother....

patti, thanks for the weekend thread, I'm going to try and post, but I'll be camping all weekend, so who knows how that will go diet-wise. Have fun with honey home at last. Do I see some sugar in your weekend?

egmdobbs, Aunt Flo unpacked all her stuff at my house too!!! And get this, I have to take her camping with me as well. Argh!!!

erinn, you are doing so well girl. I've sort of stalled out this week and I'm jealous as all get out. "Just keep swimming" is totally cracking me up, maybe you should change your screen name to "Doryfish". Sorry to hear that your love life is rocky. From your descriptions it almost sounds like your SO is passive aggressive? If it doesn't make you happy though, you need to consider a change. You have to live your life for you, not someone else. Okay end of rant.

speedy, way to go getting the ladies at work up and moving. How inspirational are you? Wow, very good.
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Old 05-21-2010, 02:58 AM
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I would love, love, love it if one time I broke up with her, she actually took it serious. I gave her an ultra-tomato yesterday when I discovered some important documents I told her to sign and mail off 2 weeks ago were still on my desk - with her note to sign and mail it off.
This is kindof typical stuff - she has no head whatsoever for the business side of the family. We don't have the pink slip to her car because she "gave it to her mom" for safekeeping... and it was lost immediately (since her mother is HOMELESS, it's understandable). Her condo got foreclosed on because she couldn't get her act together enough just to sign in and send the refi paperwork. When I suggested we let go of our rental and move into a place we could actually OWN (Mortgage was only $500!) she said she just couldn't handle it, so her credit has a foreclosure on it due to sheer laziness. Now, her student loans are in danger of defaulting... and I am over it. She has no idea what a routing number is!
If she defaults on her student loans, thus affecting MY ability to purchase a house, I am leaving. Kaput. That is the one last dream I haven't abandoned since meeting her.
I don't know what to do... how does one end a relationship with someone who won't go away? It feels most of the time that I have an extra kid.
Sorry for the rant - I know it's not fitness related - but it's a huge emotional barrier! I just wish we could get it over with and part ways already, I've begged her to change for 4 years. Then again, if we were really meant to be together, neither of us would have to change for the other.
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Old 05-21-2010, 04:38 AM
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Originally Posted by SkinnyErinn
If she defaults on her student loans, thus affecting MY ability to purchase a house, I am leaving. Kaput. That is the one last dream I haven't abandoned since meeting her.
I don't know what to do... how does one end a relationship with someone who won't go away? It feels most of the time that I have an extra kid.
Sorry for the rant - I know it's not fitness related - but it's a huge emotional barrier! I just wish we could get it over with and part ways already, I've begged her to change for 4 years. Then again, if we were really meant to be together, neither of us would have to change for the other.
Actually, I think your post is TOTALLY fitness-related. I think "healthy" encompasses a much larger realm than just physically healthy. So much of our physical health depends on our emotional, mental, and even financial health. It becomes extremely difficult to take care of yourself when you have children, and compound that problem exponentially when you have a "child" who is supposed to be an adult. You're left holding the bag for the entire family, plus trying desperately to do what's right for yourself. I 100% agree that you need to stick to your guns about her student loan debt and you desire to purchase a house. Think of the satisfaction you'll have when you purchase a house all by yourself, no emotional or financial baggage but your own.

And I disagree that "if we were really meant to be together, neither of us would have to change". I think all partnerships assume a moderate amount of change on both parties, but it's when the amount or severity of the change is completely unequal that creates a disconnect (i.e. one person feeling that they have overhauled their entire life to accomodate the other's unwillingness to adapt to the partnership). You have to decide for yourself, not anyone else, just how much inequality in your relationships you are willing to put up with. And it kind of sounds like you already have. I encourage you to follow you gut - you have no idea how becoming healthy mentally and emotionally will positively impact your physical health!
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