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New here and I need help.

Old 11-08-2011, 04:31 AM
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Default New here and I need help.

Hey everyone! I wrote in my journal and I thought that would be the best way to share here. I need some good support and help from anyone who would be willing to be there for me. Here goes:

I'm struggling right now. I had the baby in December of last year. I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight of 225 within a week (And I was still not where I wanted to be with that weight). Then at my six week check up they put me on a low dose birth control. Within the first month I watched the weight creep up even tho I was doing nothing different. Every time I had a cycle I would gain five pounds. Even tho that used to be normal, but I would lose the pounds after the cycle was over. But this time the weight stayed on and I could not budge it. Now it's November and I've gained 46 pounds! I'm very depressed about it and I hate the way I look. My stomach is the worst part. I've got a small fold of stomach fat right above my pubic area. That I know is from the baby and I will probably never get it back where I want it again. It just makes wearing things so difficult. I can't wear any of the pants I have and am wearing a 22W right now. That's the largest pant size I've ever had to wear. And they don't even fit properly. It is tight on my stomach but almost 2 sizes too big on my hips and thighs. I've been reduced to wearing work out clothes all the time because that's the only thing I feel slightly comfortable in. Working out is difficult for me because of many things. The most prominent is my left knee that never properly healed after it was broken. Secondly, I have no energy whatsoever. I'm sure I need to figure out why, my son does exhaust me but that cannot be the only reason why. Money is an issue right now so I know that it stressing me out as well. Today is the day I'm just going to have to tell myself that this can't go on and I really need to do something about it.
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Old 11-08-2011, 03:37 PM
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Hi rseavey1026. Welcome to FiDay. I can say that it works if you work it. Take a look at the features, like logging food and exercise. Some folks find it best to make one small change at a time; others jump in with both feet. Post as often as you like so you can get to know some of us; the 7-Day Motivational thread in the women's corner is always glad to have new folks join. It does sound like you have a lot going on, but you can handle things one at a time, with a lot of support. Congrats on your baby, and welcome again!
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Old 11-09-2011, 12:48 AM
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Welcome to FitDay! You have made a big step in realizing that you have work to do and doing something about it.
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Old 11-09-2011, 01:27 AM
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Oh honey, I have been in your shoes, only with daughters, 3 times over, and not the left knee but the right. You may be right about the belly pooch, as far as I can tell it's probably never going to look like it did pre-baby, but you can make it smaller and firm up all the stuff underneath. But it sounds like your goal is to wear pants that fit, not model bikinis, an infinitely more reasonable and achievable goal.

I think the best advice I ever got in terms of getting started is to study my own habits. A friend of mine said to me that you can't get where you want to go unless you know where you are. So I would recommend that you start logging your intake and your activities and look for little ways to make improvements. Start slowly, identify bad habits, and look for better ones to replace them with. Most importantly give yourself time, it takes a minimum of 3 weeks to break a bad habit and at least that long to adopt a good one. I have a theory that the time it takes to adopt a new "healthy" habit is exponentially related to just how healthy that habit is, LOL. Learn to forgive yourself, we all have diet and exercise slip-ups, so learn from your mistakes/shortcomings and move on. There have been times on this journey when I've had to start my diet over with every meal, the key is to get back on track as soon as possible and not let the disaster spiral out of control. Don't be afraid to ask for help, maybe your SO needs to make some changes too, or one of your best girlfriends/mom/sister/in-law, even a co-worker makes a good diet buddy and there is always the forum here on fitday.

You say you aren't doing anything differently than you did before, but I'll bet that's not entirely true. A baby changes everything, you might be eating the same things in the same amounts as before, but I would bet you spend a lot more time sitting and holding a baby, you've probably gotten A LOT less sleep, at least for a while, and I would also bet that you're flat out getting less movement due to all that baby holding.

It's hard to exercise as a mom, believe me I know all about that, it's a logistical nightmare to make it happen, but you gotta do it, if not for you than for the little guy. The bigger kids get the faster they move, you need to be in shape just to keep up LOL. Plus you want him to grow up healthy, and for that you need to lead by example. Gym memberships are expensive, but moms pay double, once for the membership and again for the sitter so you can use the membership. My suggestion on this would be to hit the library and see if you can check out some workout DVDs for free. If that's not an option you might try a video rental place or Netflix. Also workout DVDs aren't terribly expensive, $8-10 each, so as you can afford it buy one at a time, and maybe find a friend to swap with for a variety. If you need to start slow you might check out Walk at Home by Leslie Sansone, it's just walking to music, but you can choose how far you want to go, it's 5 miles total at about 12 minutes each, but you choose which mile your starting with. The Goodwill here in my town always has a handful of DVDs/videos too, and they are really cheap $.99 each. Another of my fave mom workouts is to dance and do the ever necessary housekeeping with my head phones on and MP3 player blaring in my ears. Little ones love to dance, so maybe you can use the stereo or radio instead.

As for the exhaustion, pregnancy hormones are with you for the 9+ months of the pregnancy, plus another year or so postpartum. You probably aren't going to wake up one morning completely energized and ready to go, it's going to take a while, but I think increasing your movement will go some ways towards helping you feel more energetic. As it turns out energy is one of those things that is counterintuitive, you actually have to move in order to generate it, at least I do. My grans always says of walking "move it or lose it", the same is true of energy. Plus if you do calorie restriction, that can cause fatigue as well, so be prepared to give it time.

Last edited by almeeker; 11-09-2011 at 01:47 AM.
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