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mdkm1980 06-16-2011 05:15 PM

So tired of being FAT
I'm a 31 year old mom of two girls (6 and 4). I used to be skinny, used to be happy with my body, used to be fit. So much for the used to be's of the past. Now I'm fat, now I'm unhappy with my weight, now I'm out of shape.

NOW I'm ready to do something about it!

Currently I weigh an embarassing (to myself) 281 lbs. My highest weight was 296, but thankfully went down to 289. My goal weight is to lose 50 lbs by Christmas.

A few weeks a go I was with my husband and girls coming out of a fast food joint. A few young punk boys rolled up in a car and said 'Hey fattie you have a choice ya know. Hey fattie I'm talking to you' and yes we were the only ones in the parking lot. I was hurt, angry, embarassed and near tears. But on the flip side they gave me the slap I needed to reevaluate myself and my body and see just how huge I have gotten.

So my DH and I went out and bought an eliptical for me, and I've taken up walking with my neighbours. I'm proud to say that I have lost 8 lbs this week alone, and although I know my weightloss may not be that large at times, at least I have the courage to try. I've given up the excuses, the laziness and picked up the pace.

I don't need to be defined by my weight anymore. I don't need to be a fat mom because it's easier than sitting on the couch all day. I'm fat and I don't need or want to be. I miss the old me, the confident, beautiful me who was able to hold her head up high and be confident that I could do anything.

Slowly, slowly I'm getting there, and I know that old me is waiting, has been all this time for me to snap out of it and get with the program!

Kathy13118 06-16-2011 05:20 PM

Wow! 8 lbs in a week is fantastic - because you've been 'moving more, ' and I'm guess eating less.

However, I can't believe those kids were so damned rude to you. Maybe it was a slap you think you needed. Well, a slap is never a good thing, especially from a stranger. I hope they eventually realize that, and learn some compassion.

You're doing well, at the start of a journey that takes time. Try to enjoy the ride and not think about the slap - think about the future you!

dear_abby 06-16-2011 05:38 PM

Your post brought a tear to my eye - you are going to make it, and we'll be rooting for you!

As for the boys, well, you can lose weight, their problem won't be solved with diet and exercise, and they'll be unhappy facing the truth at various points in life (what makes people like that? I'm sure none of them would have tried if alone). I remember as if it were yesterday someone shouting from a car as I was waiting for a bus "you don't have the legs for that skirt".


almeeker 06-16-2011 07:33 PM

Congratulations on your decision to get healthy. It's not only great for you, it's fantastic for the kids as well. Seriously, we have 3 girls, and their increased health and energy has probably been the best thing that's come out of me putting more effort in to my own health and diet. As for those rotten boys it reminds me of this t-shirt I saw once on a rather large man. It said, "I might be fat, but you're stupid and I can go on a diet". Maybe you need one that says something similar, only add "rude" in there too. Geez, some people have the worst kids. And for the record I don't think there is anything slow about your progress so far, 8 pounds in a week is the fast lane baby.

wildbeanerz 06-16-2011 08:30 PM

Welcome to the site! You have come to the perfect place for encouragement! We have all "been there" in some way or another. Those kids were very rude and their comment was completely unacceptable but I am glad that you are taking it and running with it. One of the major things that got me thinking was that my boys are both teens now and I don't want them to ever be embarrassed to have their mom show up at the school or a function. I am down 33lbs in just over 3 months. Not the fastest weight loss in the world but it works for me. Keep going and come back for support. We can do this together! :)

Kumochi 06-16-2011 09:48 PM

Welcome to the site. Try and feel good about yourself as you go through this process. Taking more care of yourslef helps rebuild the self confidence long before you reach your goal weight. Celebrate each step and come here for all the support you need. Mary

rmdaly 06-16-2011 10:22 PM

You just know that those boys are going to turn into the kind of men with pale skin, thinning hair and pot bellies wearing too-tight T-shirts that talk about how they hate "fat chicks" and think that their Victoria's Secret model is just waiting for them around the corner.

I bet you are still a beautiful woman and it sounds like your DH thinks so too.

njh50 06-17-2011 07:51 AM

What vile boys! Bet they turn out to be real charmers when they are older. Thing is they made you stop and think - sometimes that is the jolt that we need to make us look at ourselves and why we are unhappy/fat and spurs us on to do something about it. So, good for you for turning it around into motivation.

I had a similar sort of experience (not so rude) when I worked in a primary school. A very sweet 4yr old came up to me, placed her hand on my stomach and asked me when my baby was due! I was mortified and wanted the ground to open up and swallow me, but as there was no malice at all, it made me realise how fat and unfit I had got.

Well done on the 8lb loss, thats fantastic. It gives you such a boost to see results at the beginning doesn't it. Keep it up and remember you CAN do it.

mdkm1980 06-17-2011 01:20 PM

Thanks for the encouragment everyone. It's nice to see the support and the funny comments about those boys! I keep my chin up each day and one foot infront of me with a smile on my face and my daughters at my hand. They are encouraging me to be healthy and happy. DH loves me just the way I am, but understands why I don't! When I have more time I will be so happy to read about everyone on here and support and encourage like you all have.

aspikes 06-17-2011 04:58 PM

Kids can be a huge motivation. It is so great that I now have the energy and stamina to play with my 5 and 7 year olds. We ride bikes, thrown baseballs, play basketball, swim, go for long walks. You have so much to look forward to! I guarantee that you will have a better relationship with your kids as you make the journey to better health.

Good luck! Have a great weekend!

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