i feel like i've lost complete motivation, it doesn't help that the weather is now cold an rainy all the time now. But also school doesn't quite help either, with having to travel and still bounceing around places, i still don't have a set move in date with my fiance but i can't wait cuz then i can try and normallize myself...
i'm now the heaviest i've ever been and i'll probably keep getting worse...
going to herbal magic today but i doubt i can afford there plan.. but well see
Yunalee, I feel for you. I've had some really bad binge days lately. I think they've passed for now (once I remembered how terrible they make me feel both physically and emotionally), but I'm still on very shaky ground.
I'm proud of you for still checking in here even when things are tough. I usually stop tracking when I go off the rails.
Have you tried approaching the diet goals from a different direction, like setting daily nutritional goals instead of a calorie restriction goal? You'll naturally end up replacing unhealthy foods with healthy ones. And instead of being in a mindset where your goals are only attainable if you deny yourself food, eating (the right foods, of course) will help you meet your goals. It's a subtle distinction, but for me it makes a big difference mentally.
Oh, Yunalee, I can just about hear the sadness in your post. This can be a really tough road, and although there are times where it's a bit easier, there are plenty of uphill climbs (sometimes it even seems like it's all uphill). Know that even though we may exist in the oblivion that is the internet, there are plenty of people here who feel for you and are fighting the same battle.
Well, you know I always have some advice for you, so here it is. Can you try to turn that frustration and self-hatred, both of which take SO much energy, into motivation? When I was starting and full of self-hatred, and was beyond angry at myself, I would stop my inner dialogue and tell myself, "Do you want to be fat? Do you want to feel this way? Do you like wasting this energy on making yourself feel worse? No? Then get over yourself and do something about it." I realize this may sound "harsh" to some, but I am very much a pragmatic and no-BS type of person, and I find the "stop and get over it" approach to be successful.
One other thing that can help is to remember what motivation is, and what it isn't. Motivation is finding a way to do something that we don't especially want to do at that moment (eg, exercising or eating a carrot instead of cake). Motivation is NOT necessarily wanting to exercise or eat right all the time, it's finding your way past obstacles (including the ones we create) and doing it anyway. Most of us don't need motivation to do the things we really want to. With that said, I know you really want to lose weight - but remember that it's all those little moments and little decisions that will get you to that goal. Even the strongest of us will struggle with those decisions (eg, carrot vs. cake) even though the carrot will get us to our goal and the cake (in excess) will not.
I hope that helps even a little bit. I'm so glad you are here and still checking in - you may not realize it, but that in itself is a huge accomplishment. Let us know how we can help.
I started my weight loss on August 21 and found this website and started keeping track of everything I ate. What an eyeopener. I started reading food labels so I could customize some foods and i just threw away some really high fat snack foods (that I loved). I was scared taht I might be pre-diabetic so my main motivation is to become healthier. Then my son got engaged and is getting married next June, so there's my deadline. I was weighing everyday and getting frustrated, so I started weighing only on Fridays. So here I am.
I have used fitday since 2002 as a way to journal my weight loss and gains
There was not a forum so I am glad to see there is one now and I would like to do Friday weigh ins with you all.
Here is my story I was diagnoised with liver failure due to autoimmune disease related cirrohis in June. And will have to have a liver transplant in the future as liver that was destroyed is beyond repair,
Husband took me out to the ER and I was in a coma state for 5 days and within a week had 80 lbs of fluid build up within me. They drained the water off over the next month by doing several p-tap procedures. So now 3 1/2 months later I am 80 lbs (fluid build up) and 47 lbs lighter.
They have put me on a low-low sodium /low sugar/low fat/ veggie-dairy protein drink diet Hardest diet I have ever had to do but of course this is a lifestyle change and will have to be on it for life.
So now I must EAT to LIVE not LIVE to EAT.
I weigh 183.2 lbs as of this morning and want to get down to 140 lbs
Thanks for listening sorry for the ranting but would love to join in.