Biggest Loser makes me stop and think
 

I know there has to be a few of us that follow the biggest loser. So do any of you ever stop and think about what got you to the weight that your at truly? I know their all for that emotional breakthrough and that light bulb aha moment, but seriously anyone stop to think about it in their own lives. It seems like I start to and then say what's the point and I'm struggling with that at this very moment.
Why do I deserve to be thin? Why have I let myself get to the weight that I am? What has made me think that it's acceptable for me? why when I've lost the weight before and know what to do to lose it don' t I just do it again? Am I harboring that much baggage? My husband still says I'm sexy and he loves me, but is he lying to me to keep me happy? Does he really accept me?
I guess I'm just having one of those nights. Sorry to ramble. Anyone care to share their comments. thanx!

I don't think your husband's lying. Think about it in reverse- If your husband gained a few pounds, would you still love him and be attracted to him? I would hope so. I know I do mine. The more you love someone for the inside, the more attractive they become on the outside no matter what they look like. I have known beautiful skinny people who I thought were attractive at first, but once I got to know them, they became so ugly to me because of their horrible personality, that they even appeared to suddenly be ugly to me on the outside, and vice versa.

I think I know why I became big. I was abused quite a bit when I was younger in many different ways, and, in the short term, eating was my way of dealing with the shame that came with being told it was my fault, that I deserved it, that I wasn't a good little girl. I think it was also a subconscious way in the long term to make myself less attractive, more invisible. Sounds pretty messed up, huh? but so is any reason to slowly kill yourself with food.

HGB: Probably most of us can relate! Obesity is the #1 health issue in the world. I imagine there's countless reasons for overeating and lack of exercise, ranging from traumatic life experiences to simply being too busy and stressed out to take care of ourselves.

Speaking for myself, I use(d) food as a reward system...rationalizing that I don't drink, smoke, and this (fill in the blank) is going to make me feel better. But the payoff only lasts for 10 minutes, and then I must deal with the consequences.

The good news is that we don't have to have everything figured out to make a decision to change. As we strive towards improvement, issues will present themselves and we can deal with them as they come. That's what's so nice about the forum in that we have support to deal with successes and setbacks along the way.

You do deserve to be lean and healthy. As they say in 12-step programs, just take it one day at a time, and sometimes even one hour at a time:)

I'm going through a "What's the point?" period myself. I don't have a bathroom scale at the moment, which is good and bad. I haven't been to the gym in over a week due to illness, doctor's appointments, and husbands with overtime, and it will probably be another week before I get back to it unless by some miracle I have an urge to be motivated on Sunday. I have to work Saturday, so that's out, and get to do a glucose tolerance test Monday, so that day will be all shot to hell. I have to eat a high carb diet for 3 days before Monday's test, 200 grams per day. I don't eat 200g on a bad day! The sample breakfast is toast with jelly, cereal out of a box with milk, and fruit juice, ick. In the morning when I typically have no appetite anyway. I'm not sure if I'm more worried they will find something or they won't. On one hand it would explain a lot of things, but on the other it could end up being another "justification" for my bad habits and lazy behaviors.

Wow, I'm rambling too lol. I guess the short answer is I think I know how you feel. I know I tend to overthink and obsess about things, like I just did above. Sometimes one day at a time is all any of us can do.

Boy you are having a rough night. I don't follow the Biggest Loser show much on TV although I have watched it and would love to see them have a season called "Biggest Loser - Kidnapped" because I would like to arrange a few kidnappings...

I can't say for sure what caused my own weight gain, but it crept up slowly over the course of the last 15-20 years, so I tend to think it happened because I didn't take the time to exercise quite enough and I have a natural tendency toward a high carb, low protein diet. My whole life I've heard all the excuses for why women gain weight, but none of them seemed to fit me precisely. Sure I have emotions, and hormones, occasional bouts of low willpower, and a monthly period, but I don't feel like those issues control me for more than a few days at a time. Yet I started this journey at double what I should weigh.

I don't know your husband, but I seriously doubt he is lying to you. It's like the NessaSonic said, if the situation was reversed, would you still love him? Of course you would, unless you only married him because of his gorgeous body? I've been overweight most of my adult life, so I can say for certain that yes even fat girls are lovable and sexy (we also tend to be faithful, adoring and fantastic cooks). It's all a matter of attitude. I can say for certain that if you yourself, are down in the dumps, and don't feel sexy, then chances are you're not putting off those "come get me" sexy vibes, which in turn is probably reducing your overall sex appeal. You might consider adding to your new healthy lifestyle exercises in "learning to love yourself and be happy, no matter your dress size". Good health is about more than what you eat.

I'm almost stumped by the question of whether or not you "deserve" to be thin. It's not a privilege handed out to a chosen few, it's all about you choosing to live life in the healthiest way possible. So I guess my answer is that if you make the effort to adopt healthy habits and lose your poor habits, then yes of course you deserve it. Why not you?

Almeeker: Sometimes simple and rational is the best way to approach "complicated" thinking patterns...well said!