fit4luv

Mern ~ I love the PC version a lot better than online. Online I had the free version -- which is good. I like that I don't have to go online & that I just click an icon on my computer to chart. I then have the option to go premium if even for a month or two if I'd want my dietician or anyone else to see what I am doing.

Mike ~ I'm so sorry for you & your girlfriend splitting up. What a rough time that must be. I'm with the others -- please vent all you care to.

And to All - To those who post & to those who only read ~ May we all pamper ourselves today with something healthy today! Have a Fit Friday!!!

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FIT Challenge: [Mon-Sat] *Sun= "Cushion" Day
*~* Check-in:M-T-W-R

FOCUS (3)
Faith
*/* Audio Bible daily ----> x4/x6

Support
*/* Attend Health Support Group -> Yes
*/* Report here Daily ->x4/x7

INTAKE (3)
Food
*/* Non-starchy Veg. 4 serv. daily -> N-N-Y-N (Had 3 & 1/2 serv.)
*/* Starchy Food 8 serv.daily limit-> Y-Y-Y-Y

Supplement */* Vit. & Fish Oil Daily ----->x4/x7

TRAIN (3)
Feet*/* STEPS wkly ~ 14 mi * 30,000 steps -> 9 mi * 19,008 steps
*/* AEROBIC wkly {120"} -> 70"

Firm & Flex ~ */* Strong Women x2 wkly -> x2/x2

01gt4.6

Huge rant!
One of my GF’s issue is with my daughter. A while back I sent DD back to live with her mom b/c I felt that she needed to get a job and be more responsible. GF tells me then that I need to discuss with her if DD is coming back b/c if DD does, she’s leaving. DD got a part time job, was working it. DD wanted more hours so then she got another job (at Sonic). She recently got her driver’s license and wasn’t comfortable just yet driving from her moms house in Mississippi to work, by my house. DD has picked up a 3rd job, this one at the mall. She went from no job to 3 jobs.
My issue is money. We split bills and GF and I have our own “assigned” bills. GF told her oldest DD (20 y/o) that she’d pay for her car insurance while she’s in college b/c she “couldn’t afford it”. (I thought that was crazy b/c her DD was always going to concerts, mission trips and was even sending money to some 3rd world country to support a kid.) A while back my GF had a douche bag State Farm agent that was screwing her over. (I posted about this a while back) I tried to convince GF to switch to me for the car insurance. I was $13/yr higher. She had the nerve to ask what was in it for her! Finally after getting tired of her State Farm agent she moved her and her DD’s cars to my policy. My car is the cheapest of the 3 and the bill tripled. She was to continue to pay her and her DD’s part and hasn’t. Since May she’s paid twice, so I’ve been stuck paying for everyone. That pisses me off b/c I don’t even pay for my DD’s insurance. She wanted me to put her youngest DD on my cell phone plan was supposed to help out with that, and hasn’t.
I haven’t said much b/c, we’ve both leaned on each other in the past and I had the money but I was quickly getting bled dry. I felt like GF was leaning on me b/c money was tight for her, she dished out nearly $2000 to put her youngest DD in cheerleading and send her to Disney. So when the dryer went out, I reached in my pocket, replaced the TV (remember that rant), back in my pocket.
Around the beginning of December, my account was hit hard between paying my bills, some of GF’s bills and the bulk of Christmas. I was starting to worry b/c I knew I had a big commission coming off next week. A month ago, I told my GF that I needed some help b/c I’m been bearing the brunt of the car insurance for 3 people and I was about to have some commission come off.
GF needed a vehicle b/c her car was falling apart. She wanted a BIG truck b/c a couple years back she was in 3 accidents in her small car. We looked around and we found her truck that we got her 2 weeks ago. I was able to work up a smoking deal but I thought the car note was going to kick her in the ass, especially since she was struggling before that. She decided that she’d cut back and make it work. We knew the first month was going to be a struggle b/c of putting down a down payment. Every year GF gets a huge tax return so she was focusing on that coming up. I drained my bleeding-to-death checking account to loan her some money for the down payment. I put up $1500, a couple days later she was able to pay me back $500.
Car insurance was due last week, GF said she’d pay. That came and went, so I paid it. Now I’m sweating bullets b/c my E&O insurance ($1009)is due 2/1/2012 and over the past few months I’ve put out ~$5000 on top of my regular bills and about $2500 in commissions just came off… oh yeah her daughter just got back from another mission trip. See I can DREAM about a bike, but I won’t pull the trigger until I know it’s safe, which will probably be another year or 2.
On to the fight… I get home yesterday and I get the quite treatment. She’s short with me and has an attitude, I asked what was wrong and once again I get “nothing”. I go to the gym, come back and she is still pissed. We end up getting into it. She says “DD has been at the house for 5 weeks. What happened to the respect of discussing with me about DD moving back.” I said I haven’t discussed it with DD to see what’s going on, it’s not like she “moved back.” I then told her I’m not going ask her permission for my daughter to move back with me. She said that it’s fucked up b/c out of respect I was supposed to discuss it with her first. I then said what about the respect for me? I never got a warning or a discussion about “hey, once I get on your insurance policy, I’m going to bail out and you’re going to be stuck paying for my AND my DD’s insurance!”
She now realizes that even though all her bills (including the ones that I’m paying fit into her budget, she bit off more than she could chew. Now she wants to sell her 2 week old truck and I guess GTFO. According to her, it’s my DD or her. Don’t make a person make that choice b/c you will not like the results. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass!

wildbeanerz

Health/Fitness Goals...
1. 100oz water a day M: Yes, T: Yes, W: Yes, Th: Yes,
2. Limit of one diet Coke daily M: Yes, T: Yes, W: Yes, Th: Yes,
3. Walk on lunch unless actually raining except Tuesday (work through lunch to go to an appointment)...who cares if it is cold out! M: 1.5m in 26min, T: N/A, W: 1-1/8m in 30min (stopped to grocery shop in there too), Th: Raining & working through lunch, F: errands to run
4. Listen to myself when I'm full. No eating just because I want more. M: Yes, T: Yes, W: Yes, but barely!, Th: Yes,
5. Workout 4 out of 5 days Weds-Sun W: 1hr 5min, Th: 55min, F: Day off,
6. Weigh and post it every day M: 276.4, T: 273.2, W: 272.8, Th: 272.2, F: 272.0,
7. Be very careful about eating after dinner, seems to be a problem lately. M: Yes, T: Yes, W: Yes, Th: Yes,

Life Goals ...
1. Keep hands busy in the evening. Do something other than facebook for a while. M: Yes, T: Yes, W: Yes, Th: Yes,
a. Mend the rest of hubby's work socks. M: No, T: Yes - DONE!
2. Do handwashing. M: No, T: No, W: No (why do my new bras say handwash anyway? I've never done that before.), Th: Nope, they are going in the gentle cycle I don't have time for handwashing!

Last night was great food wise. Hubby made cheesesteaks and home fries for dinner. He made me baked sweet potato fries... Yum! And I made a salad to put my steak and cheese on instead of the 270 calorie buns that he was eating. And I would have had two of them if I ate on buns. Nothing except 1 sugar free popsicle was eaten after dinner. I had to run to the grocery store and then do the dinner dishes. After that I kept my hands busy by writing checks to pay the monthlies. Ugh! Then I had to wrap up a package that needs shipped when I go on my lunch today. Have to go on lunch because if I am more than 5 minutes late leaving work the post office will be closed when I get there and they aren't open when I come to work. So there goes my walking on lunch today but honestly the wind is whipping and it is about 20* out there and snowing lightly so....really, I didn't want to walk anyway LOL. Until all that was done and I showered it was about time for bed anyway so I didn't get crafty but I didn't eat either. And one other thing....my hubby didn't either! He is a bigger guy and has started telling me he wants to lose weight. He honestly can't work out. He hurts so much from his daily physical job and old back injury that I couldn't expect him to exercise. If he can get off some pounds by reducing the snacks he may feel better enough to start walking though.

Lizzie ... I LOL'd at your panty stories! Sounds like you have a great bunch of friends! ... What a nice email you got from your ex. Bet that was a confidence booster! ... Good for you on trying to cook more often than warming up a tv dinner.... I never realized that it doesn't snow often in Ireland. I just assumed since you were northern that it snowed.

Mern ... Congrats on the breakfast victory! ... I know all about you crazy Ohio drivers in the snow. Hubby and I lived in Columbus for a year and it snowed about 2 inches once and the whole city shut down. Stores closed, no public transportation, anything city related was closed. WTH? LOL ... I've never had chili over spaghetti here. But we do eat leftover spaghetti over fried potatoes.

Quinn ... Sorry to hear about your mom's friend. A Seinfeld episode though? Something funny must have happened during the day. ... LOL on sounding like from the south. I have been told when I lived in OH that I sound southern. Nope, from PA, born & raised. I think it is the hick in my voice that tricked them!

Joanna ... That car trouble could have led to much worse than some chocolate. I hope that this is the end of your car troubles.

Tori ... LOL @ Country talk. I try at work not to let that come out but sometimes it does. ... You need to get that water down girl! ... Good calories yesterday despite eating out.

Cassie ... You are doing great on your goals this week. Finding papers that you have been looking for for a long time is exciting! ... Nice compliment too!

Mike ... Sorry to hear about you and your GF. I had a feeling when you weren't talking that something was up. We are all here to listen if you want to talk, ramble or vent.

Darlene .. Hope your day was crazy for good reasons.

Amy ... What was it you said before that your daughter calls it when you have lamb? Meat? LOL ... Your kids got a 4 day weekend then due to a few inches of snow. I am with you on the worse in the afternoon part though. I would rather they cancel than send them home early because the roads are that bad. ... School cancels here for more than 6 inches of snow or severe ice. High winds with temps under zero will get a 2 hr delay. ... I laughed about your neighbors improved view of you weeding the flowers. Too bad I don't really have any neighbors!!

01gt4.6

Up until yesterday everything was fine between us (in regards to my DD). For the past week I was stressing about $$, not her.

BTW thanks everyone for the warm wishes. It felt good getting that rant off my chest.

almeeker

I have to say that if she holds you to that ultimatum then she's already made her decision, however it really seems like this fight isn't about children, it's about money. And it's not so much a fight as financial stress that is exploding in other ways. Hopefully you two can work it out. I think that's one of the things I like best about being married, we have one checkbook and discuss any unplanned expense over $200-300, before it's paid, we're very much on the same team and we work it out together. From your description it sounds like you and GF might be more opponents than team mates? DH and I have had some insanely tight seasons in our relationship, through the worst one I read a book called "Financial Peace", it made a world of difference. It's a bit more religion than I get from our financial adviser, but all the advice about money and budgeting is sound and very very helpful. Even some of the religious stuff I found fairly pertinent, the author goes into detail about why we need to donate to charity and how that goes hand in hand with achieving financial peace. Whatev, at a minimum it should put you and GF on the same page.

almeeker

LOL, yes we have to call lamb "leg of meat" around littlest DD. Oh dear Lord not 4 days, only 3, they are going back to school on Monday if I have to drop them off at the principal's house! Somehow or another they don't have MLK Day off, they have a 3 1/2 day weekend next week for midwinter break.

Actually the comment on my improved weeding view was from a friend's DH who passes our house on his way to and from work everyday. Believe me the neighbor man has always been game to play pattycakes with me. I can't claim any great beauty, or drop dead figure, he's just lonely and um, desperate. So be glad you have no neighbors, be very very glad.

01gt4.6

Thanks Amy for the advice. I think her problem is that she doesn't want to tell her kids no. That's cool, but don't volunteer to pay her insurance and stick me with. That's just wrong. If she can't afford to pay for it, she needs to sit down with her DD and tell her that as much as she wants to pay it for her, she can't.

I told her a long time ago that her daughter can afford it, hell she's been working for a few years and both of her vehicles were given to her. She CAN afford it but she doesn't HAVE to so why should she?

I also agree that donating to a charity is a good thing but I think until you are fending for yourself you shouldn't be sending someone else money.

Lizards13

Mike. I totally agree with you, I have a BF of 13 years but if I decide to to help out my grown kids then that's what I do with MY money. It would be different if they were little kids and we were all living together pooling our resources, then it's the good and the bad scenario.

Mern. Flax here gets used to make the best linen in the world - Irish lol. I actually found milled flaxseed in the supermarket today but omg was it expensive around the equivalent of $10 for a small bag. The muffins may have to wait as I'm convinced that I will waste all that money trying to bake something edible.

Made the chilli tonight and it was very tasty, have enough for two more meals in the freezer. Off to play sports on the Wii for a while, gets me up off the sofa.

wildbeanerz

Only time for a quick comment but I have often wondered how long couples last who keep all their funds separately. I have a friend who is married and she and her hubby do everything moneywise separate. My hubby and I discuss everything that we spend. Then again we don't have extra to use and we only have one checkbook so if one were to use out of it then the other may overdraw the account.

I hate that she gave you an ultimatum like that. That is like saying that it is up to you if she gets to stay with you or not when really she is just threatening to leave. How can she expect you not to help your daughter (who is helping herself!) when she is helping one who seems kind of ungrateful?

I hope it all works out for the best for everyone.

quinnesec

Mike,

Ok... I wasn't going to, but I'm going to put my amateur shrink's hat on for a moment (sorry, Cassie... lol). Let me preface by saying that you didn't ask for my advice, and you're free to tell me to jump in the lake. (Although, I cant... it's frozen. )

It sounds like a trust issue to me. If after 8 years, you haven't either, 1. gotten married or 2. haven't combined your finances, either she doesn't trust you, you don't trust her or both. A relationship has to be 50/50, in all aspects. Ask yourself, "Who's benefiting more from staying together?" It sounds like, from what you've said, that she gets a home, truck, insurance, and care for her kids. What do you get? Maybe I'm completely off base, but it sounds like she's taking advantage of a nice guy. The old Ann Lander's advice applies, "Would you be better off with her or without her?" She sounds like high maintenance to me, but I'm not there. Maybe it's time that she pulls her 50%.

Ok... I'll go try to throw myself into the lake now... Sheesh... when will I learn to keep my opinions to myself?? You're going to wish that I was still busy with my paperwork! LOL