7 Day Motivational Thread starting 12 December
12-14-2011, 09:24 AM
#81
FitDay Premium Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Riverside, CA
Posts: 2,042
I totally agree with what you're saying. I wish that I had a nickle for each of my friends that married a guy that treated them like garbage. The problem with a lot of women, (and that nice guys probably don't get) is that a lot of women think that they can "save" someone, or "...he is really a good person, but no one understands him", which usually ends in disaster.
The advice that I give to my daughter, is to "always reach up, not down to a date." The last guy she dated was a so-so student. She thought he had potential, so she spent 2 years pushing him academically and tutoring him, even though he was 2 years older. His grades improved dramatically, he was accepted at a great school, and then he dumped her. Lesson learned... the hard way, but it was learned.
I totally understand why "nice guys" get frustgrated with otherwise intelligent women choosing losers. It would tick me off, too. My husband was kind of our town's eligible bachelor. He happily played the field for years, well after most of his friends married. We were best friends and had a business relationship for years... never dated, even though he would bring up the possibility occasionally. I told him that I didn't want to be another of his "fluff balls".
If we had a function to attend, but no date, we would call each other. His family knew me and mine knew him, because we were like brother and sister, always attending family events together, if we weren't seeing someone. Four years later, he talked me into trying dating, and we were making wedding plans a month later. I guess I was the only one that provided him with a challenge.
The advice that I give to my daughter, is to "always reach up, not down to a date." The last guy she dated was a so-so student. She thought he had potential, so she spent 2 years pushing him academically and tutoring him, even though he was 2 years older. His grades improved dramatically, he was accepted at a great school, and then he dumped her. Lesson learned... the hard way, but it was learned.
I totally understand why "nice guys" get frustgrated with otherwise intelligent women choosing losers. It would tick me off, too. My husband was kind of our town's eligible bachelor. He happily played the field for years, well after most of his friends married. We were best friends and had a business relationship for years... never dated, even though he would bring up the possibility occasionally. I told him that I didn't want to be another of his "fluff balls".
If we had a function to attend, but no date, we would call each other. His family knew me and mine knew him, because we were like brother and sister, always attending family events together, if we weren't seeing someone. Four years later, he talked me into trying dating, and we were making wedding plans a month later. I guess I was the only one that provided him with a challenge. I have definitely dated a few bad boys in my life. Unlike my sister, who I'll get to later, it wasn't because I thought I could save them, it was because there is just something hot about flirting with a little danger. The relationships never lasted long (didn't really expect them to), but they were pretty intense while they lasted. I think it is often that intensity that women go for - to disasterous results as Quinn said. A lot of it, for me, was about noticed by the bad boy in the first place, 'cuz then maybe it meant that I was kinda of a bad girl. (Which actually I was... but we'll save that for another day.)
My sister on the otherhand dated losers. Bad boys more in the "bad at life" sense than dangerous bad. And for her it was definitly about saving them and improving them. Something that she failed to do in 100% of the time.
12-14-2011, 09:35 AM
#82
Super Moderator
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Slidell, Louisiana
Posts: 8,232
Thank you for understanding. 
I can believe this. This may be the same thing, I guess, I've had more women come on to me with I had on a wedding band. It seems like when you're married, they come out the wood work. Is it that same for y'all, do more guys hit on married women?
I can believe this. This may be the same thing, I guess, I've had more women come on to me with I had on a wedding band. It seems like when you're married, they come out the wood work. Is it that same for y'all, do more guys hit on married women?
12-14-2011, 10:25 AM
#83
FitDay Premium Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Riverside, CA
Posts: 2,042
Yeah, I think it is kind of the same thing. Although with women coming on to a guy with a wedding band, it may also be that she's just looking for a little fun and knows that a married guy isn't likely to get too carried away.
I haven't really experience that as a woman. In fact, long before I actually got married, I wore a wedding ring when I traveled just to avoid such encounters. And for the most part it worked.
I haven't really experience that as a woman. In fact, long before I actually got married, I wore a wedding ring when I traveled just to avoid such encounters. And for the most part it worked.
12-14-2011, 10:37 AM
#84
FitDay Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Chesnee, SC
Posts: 1,303
Oh I corrected my red, I guess I was trying to be festive. I don't know about a race, but I'll be there for Mardi Gras!!!
12-14-2011, 10:38 AM
#85
Super Moderator
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Slidell, Louisiana
Posts: 8,232
12-14-2011, 11:06 AM
#87
FitDay Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Chesnee, SC
Posts: 1,303
I used to have a serious diet coke habit, I would literally drink 6-12 cans/day. And then wonder why I couldn't sleep. I never intended to quit the habit, just cut back. At first I would let myself have a dc for every bottle of water I finished. Then I cut back to not letting my myself have any until I'd finished all my water, so I had to switch to caffeine free because I never finished my last one until late in the day. Pretty soon I'd quit and hadn't even noticed. Baby steps, that's the key.
And it's never even been planned, I just seem to find them. The last one I dated I met at the gas station. How redneck is that??? Had it worked out, and our future kids had asked how we met, we'd have to make something up. Cause you can't tell anyone you met their parent at the gas station buying beer.OMG I freaking LOVE N.O. And the food is second to none. I have a friend who's ex is from there and we'd always get him to cook for us. Sadly, they aren't together anymore and I have to try and cook it for myself. Sometimes it turns out, sometimes it doesn't. If I could afford to, and wouldn't miss my family like crazy I'd move down in a heartbeat!!!
12-14-2011, 11:17 AM
#88
FitDay Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Chesnee, SC
Posts: 1,303
Health/Fitness
1-under 1300 calories....hoping for better numbers than last week M1071 Tu1542oops
2-48 oz water daily...64 was just not manageable for me M-sooo close that I'm giving myself this one Tuno
3-1 Dt Dew daily....I'm sticking with this one until I nail it M-YES TuYES
4-Exercise 5 times...should have no excuses this week, I'm perfectly healthy Mno Tuno unless shopping til the stores close counts?
5-45% or less carbs....40% was really tough, I usually kept under 45 though M57% it was that dang Frosty and it's sugar!! Tu39% even if I went over my calories
6-log log log....a no brainer, but it's easy green! MYES TuYES
7-shooting for 2 more lbs M-didn't weigh Tu-didn't weigh
1-under 1300 calories....hoping for better numbers than last week M1071 Tu1542oops
2-48 oz water daily...64 was just not manageable for me M-sooo close that I'm giving myself this one Tuno
3-1 Dt Dew daily....I'm sticking with this one until I nail it M-YES TuYES
4-Exercise 5 times...should have no excuses this week, I'm perfectly healthy Mno Tuno unless shopping til the stores close counts?
5-45% or less carbs....40% was really tough, I usually kept under 45 though M57% it was that dang Frosty and it's sugar!! Tu39% even if I went over my calories
6-log log log....a no brainer, but it's easy green! MYES TuYES
7-shooting for 2 more lbs M-didn't weigh Tu-didn't weigh
12-14-2011, 11:26 AM
#89
Super Moderator
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Slidell, Louisiana
Posts: 8,232
OMG I freaking LOVE N.O. And the food is second to none. I have a friend who's ex is from there and we'd always get him to cook for us. Sadly, they aren't together anymore and I have to try and cook it for myself. Sometimes it turns out, sometimes it doesn't. If I could afford to, and wouldn't miss my family like crazy I'd move down in a heartbeat!!!
Rose, I forgot that Chico was still on the tree. Do you want me to keep him up there?
Last edited by 01gt4.6; 12-14-2011 at 11:42 AM.
12-14-2011, 12:04 PM
#90
FitDay Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Chesnee, SC
Posts: 1,303
Afford to? The cost of living is really good here. The food is awesome and the people are unique... to say the least. Have you even been for Mardi Gras? It's insane! Have you been back since Katrina? It's not like I've been to too many places but I can say that I've never tasted food anywhere else this even remotely close to being as good as here. That makes it hard to stay in shape! What really sucks is when I'm out of town and I have place that has "New Orleans" food, never fails, I'm always like WTF are y'all thinking? If I had the money I'd love to open up a true New Orleans joint elsewhere just to give other people a taste of some real food.
The first time I came down there was a couple of months before Katrina. We helped my cousin and his family move into the Baptist Semenary. He wound up having to stay after the storm, but his family moved back up here. The next year I went back with his wife to help move some of their stuff back down, I'm thinking hurricane season started like a week after I helped her move back down and I asked her "are y'all sure about this? I mean, didn't you just have to move back to SC because of a hurricane???" He finished up his masters there and then moved to Raleigh, NC to work on his doctorate. He was only in NC for a year when he realized that he and his family were meant to be in N.O. So, they're back now as he finishs up his doctorate.
There was one place up here that sold authentic N.O. food, the guy was actually from down there, and it was a-maz-ing!! But, he went out of business because the freaks up here wouldn't frequent the restaurant. He even had frozen precooked meals that you could buy so you didn't actually have to eat at his restaurant. I miss that guy......
