Kathy13118

'I often think I eat because I am not sure where my next meal is coming from, so I feel like I have to load up NOW.'

I feel that way, too, and have in the past. The conflict is that I've never been able to plan out all the food I'm going to eat - into meals and snacks. I always wanted (and want) to be able to say 'yes' if my husband says, 'Let's go out to x and have some y tonight... Spontaneity, I guess, is what I want to preserve. Even to the point that every meal is: what can I make from what's in the fridge right at this moment!

One way I've dealt with that is not to eat so many calories at the beginning of the day. Then I have more to play with when I make food choices later. But if I should end up eating a big breakfast, on a trip, for example, I do it knowing that I probably can't do it all. Eat a nice lunch somewhere and a nice dinner somewhere AND have drinks later. Can't do it all. And if I do, for some reason, the next day would be a good day to eat very very lightly. It averages out.


Keeping some caloric limit (a number) in mind makes it manageable.

bizeemom3

Hey Ang- Wish you were here in AZ to help me keep myself accountable. You would love my very in your face trainer. I had just texted him yesterday about lusting after bread and how my bread bakers were very expensive doorstops, when he called me on how my BF hadn't been budging and that I needed to continue tightening up my diet!

So here I go, tightening. I am cutting out the diet soda completely, and limiting my wine to one glass two nights a week. I am also returning to Fit Day to make sure I am keeping carbs under a 100, and protein at 145 (my target weight) In addition, I am jogging intervals with some newbies to our boot camp on off days, walking my dog everyday, and continuing with my boot camp workouts at least 3 X weekly.
Water intake is a necessity here and I am thirsty all the time, so I always have ice water of herbal iced tea in my hand. I also use Stevia exclusively at home as my husband is diabetic. (He thinks it's real, I put it in the old sugar box!)

So good luck this week, I will check in again!

Melissa, 47, 165, 5"10"

brandismom1990

OMG I am MORTIFIRED.

Here I am claiming to be "Driven" to do this and I am five days from my last post and completey "off the rails" in some ways.

Okay -- WHO IS IT THAT HAS THE "IF YOU DROP ONE EGG, YOU DON'T THROW THE OTHER 11 ON THE FLOOR" saying -- it is 2:13 on a Saturday and I have dropped 5 eggs, but still have 7 left that I am going to seperate and give the yolks to my underweight husband and whip myself up an egg white omelette.

Did I mention that I run a food business in addition to a marketing business. And the weird thing is, when I first started and was in the throws of recipe development, I LOST WEIGHT. I got my "food fix on". But now, in the mundaneness of trying to sell and keep clients happy, I am back to shoveling food in my gullet without thought.

YUCK!!!

In addition, my real biz, my cash cow, is taking off by leaps and bounds all of the sudden (up from just two weeks ago when I had $25 in my checking account and NO way to pay several bills). MY LIFE IS INSANE.

Okay -- enough. I am spinning. I've gotta' get a grip. I need to go meditate and really start thinking about how I look at FOOD. I mean, here I am trying to ensure my clients in the food co. get proper nutrition and I am not caring for myself or evidence of real health!!!

ANd, in six weeks, I have to teach choreography to 30 professional dancers. And I weight over 200 lbs!!!!! That has to change.

RIGHT. FREAKIN. NOW.

SO, let me spin a few minutes more on the monkey-go-round and purge the sh*t that makes me crazy!!!

• Why can't I have a "normal" relationship with food. I read books by Anthony Bordain and Julie Powel and other "foodies" I respect and they eat. They eat normally and they aren't overweight grossly. THey understand that it is OKAY to eat a steak, but for the taste, not quantity.
  
• If I can't have a "normal" realationship with food, then why can't I just get over it. Only a child gets everything they want in life, right?
  
• I could find balance. I could eat high quality, fresh, food snobbery greens, fishes, whole grains with gusto and great preparation because I KNOW HOW TO COOK REALLY WELL. THen once a week or so, have a steak wrapped in bacon. That would, at least, be eating food within reason.
  
• I don't have to punish myself or ALLOW myself to fall off the rails because I have one night where I eat a half of a pizza and drink six glasses of wine all by myself! I can say "okay, now get on with it and have something more reasonable today, add a few more minutes of cardio and self-correct."
  
• I could do all of these things -- because I am quite capable and intellignent.

SO WHY DON'T I?

These are answers I seek -- how do you all do it? How do you find balance between deprivation, enjoyment and well . . .BALANCE? Can anyone chime in here?

MEan while -- there's a sex and the city episode where Amazon recommends a book to Charlotte called "Starting over, yet again." -- does that book really exist?

If not, I'm writing it now.

Today will be a three-pointer. I am up on cals already but not off the rails. It's 2:25 and I envision myself driving to Whole Foods around 6:00 and buying some amazing greens and making myself a to die for salad and maybe some of their homemade soup ( a vegetable-y broth-y one) or maybe make one myself with some Thai chicken stock, chicken breast and vegetables.

I'm going to hit a "FIRM" right now and give the dog an extra long walk once the sun goes down in way too hot Florida.

And I'm going to down a gallon of water.

I'm also going to prepare a snack bin for my drive to my family home FILLED with healthy yummies that I can keep on hand there because they make me CRAZY! ANd I will not let that make me go off the rails (my husband used that expression bout a biz issue the other day and now I can't let it go :-) )

And I am going to start over, yet again. Right now, not tomorrow, not after throwing down more eggs. Right now.

Thanks for listening and being supportive (and soon, I hope I will get an a&& kicking trainer who holds me accountable -- if the biz keeps going the way it does, I plan on it!)

Rubystars

Brandi I have a refrigerator full of fresh fruit and vegetables and that's basically what I eat except for one meal a day with some meat in it. I don't think that's weird. In the morning (typical day) I have a plate of fruit and some yogurt, for lunch some vegetables and two 98% fat free hot dogs on wheat bread slices or a can of tuna (nothing added) with some wheat bread for a sandwich, and for dinner usually a healthy choice or lean cuisine. I've been having to eat higher calorie snacks lately to be able to get ENOUGH calories.

This morning I ate a huge plate of spaghetti squash for breakfast (half the squash), later I ate a huge plate of black grapes, then a couple of the hot dogs. I went to sleep (because I sleep during the day, stay up at night) and when I woke up I had an avocado and some raw shelled sunflower seeds and I came in at 1126 for the day.

If I didn't have the higher calorie foods (the avocado and seeds) I might have had to eat a lot more food to even get that much. I can't emphasize enough how much fresh produce is helping me to reach my calorie goals. I'm aiming for 1400-1500 a day and yet lately I'm reaching 1200 if I'm lucky. At no point during the day was I actually hungry.

mecompco

Our lives and food problems seem a lot alike. You HAVE to, as you've shared, just freakin' do this! Take no prisoners, (wo)man up and acknowlege that people like us may never be able to eat "normally" for whatever reason. Just like alcoholics can't ever drink "normally". I've come to that realization and I'm fine with it. After 15 months of daily logging it's second nature and I plan to do it "forever".

Yes, I have days I go over my limit, but I don't do it often and I log everything and move on. All or nothing thinking has derailed me in the past, but no longer. I DO take a zero tolerance stand against sweets, ice cream, pastries and the like as there is no good reason to eat them and that has been a major weakness for me in the past (a dozen DD donuts in one shot, no problem!).

Anyway, I see you've quoted Jedi Master Yoda and I agree. I never, ever say I'm "trying" to lose weight, nor do I ever wish anyone "luck" in their weigt loss endeavours. There is NO try nor is there any luck involved.

Regards,
Michael

mamathib

I just read your initial post and it was like you were speaking directly to me. I am printing out the message, as a matter of fact, to use as my daily "slap up side the head". We have a lot in common, and I would be happy to be straight with you, and will certainly follow your posts.
I am very food addicted, and even realize it when I shove the Ritz into my mouth. I know it is self-medication.
I wrote a lengthy reply a moment ago and somehow it was lost so this will be brief, but you really touched me and have given me the push I needed to get my focus.

Sarah

lastri

You are right. This is every individual journey and only oneself can turn the switch on or off. I have gain 8 pounds on vacation and continue to gain 2 more 6 weeks post vacation. I am really addicted to food. In the moment, I don't know how to turn the switch to go back. Every morning I promised myself to do it, and every night i ruin it. Seem like the encouragement and the motivation from others has not affective lately. And I know that is my problem and I am still wait for my switch turn on the right direction.
Mai

mecompco

Mai, that switch is tricky business. How about picking a day, say a week from now, that is "free"? On that day, you can indulge (but still log it). That will give you something to look forward to, and it is planned so it's not a "cheat". Just a thought, as the old "all or nothing" thinking is a quick trip back to Fat City (been there, done that, have the 8x T shirt to prove it).

Regards,
Michael

lastri

Thank you Michael! Your journey is such an inpiration to me. Congratulation on your weight loss.
I think you did give a good idea. I'll think about it.
So far I am doing good today. If I could squeezed in an exercise at lunch hour, I would be very happy. Well enough talking, time to work out.
Thank you again,
Mai

Kathy13118

When you look at food, do you see the calories first, and then the flavor and taste come second? Then, can you see the same food with the flavor and taste first and the calories second?

My take on eating good food and enjoying good food on a diet is that you have to switch back and forth between those two orderings of priority. One can't take over for any length of time, and you can never lose sight of the other (and the consequences).

Sure, foodies and chefs can be slim. There are plenty of foodies and chefs who aren't, though. I had a friend who had a problem with weight, as did her husband. They were both foodies. loved restaurants, ate with clients at the best places, loved to cook, and both were overweight. The wife told me that they wouldn't eat food unless it was of the best quality and taste. They were fat. Then the husband went on Weight Watchers with his co-workers, on the job. They switched gears and looked at the 'points' (or calories) of what they were eating. She followed the program with him, and, pound for pound, they both lost weight at the same rate. They made all the adjustments to their portion sizes and choices, but still stuck to the 'if it isn't the best, we're not going to eat it...'

It made sense. Why waste the calories if it's not great food and you have access to great food?

However, when he left his job (and his WW group), they gave up the diet - even after losing 20-something pounds, each - and put the weight back on. In their case, the support from his group at work, and her joining him at home on the diet, were key. Take one element away, and the diet didn't work.

Even though they kept food quality AND weight loss on their diet, the support thing was key. They didn't even think of it that way, either - both got caught up in all the new situations of his changing jobs and then eventually, moving out of state. Life intervened, in other words - but they didn't use WW to get through the crises. They could have (they were both dieting, so they actually reinforced all the good habits) but they didn't.

My point (and I do have one) is that you can have both. You can be a foodie and you don't have to go to WW for that. But you do have to be somewhat humbled by the power of the calorie, and the reasons for counting calories.

Fitday gives you a calorie level for losing weight. You can know exactly how much you need to eat EVERY day to lose weight over a period of time, like a month. It may be slow, but it will work. As it becomes your habit to know how many calories you are eating, you'll know WHY you don't lose a pound or two every two weeks (a decent rate, as long as you aren't regaining the lost weight).

The problem I have with 'going off the diet' even for a day is this: you can self-sabotage, big time.

Example: you know that, over a week's time, you lose a pound if you eat 2200 calories a day or less (that's my limit but it varies according to your age, weight, height, etc.). Monday through Saturday, you've been eating 2200 plus maybe 100 or 200 extra calories one or two days. You may be able to have those calories make very little impact on your weight loss. As the calories average out for the week (see the fitday report that shows that), it's not so much. But then, on Sunday, you cut loose and figure, it's just one day, so what? You drink alcohol, you eat GREAT food and it's got lots of calories - let's say you get up in the 4000 calorie or even 5000 calorie range just for that day!

Not that hard to do if you're really enjoying a social occasion and deliberately saying to yourself, 'Calories don't matter today, I'm just going for the gusto!'

4500 calories averaged in over the week? It's going to undo your slow but steady progress!

When you realize the impact of that (you can see it in the report from fitday), even if you don't see the weight gain right away (you may see it two days later), you might come to the realization - AHA! all I have to do is starve myself for a day or two (drinking Slimfast or eating raw veggies and drinking vegetable juice) and I may be able to still have that 'feast day'! So you do that and you end up being in a feast and famine type situation that eventually makes you think that dieting, and calorie-counting, just plain suck. Yeah, so what else is new?

Calories are not such an evil thing. You can have fantastic, delicious calories but in small portions. Adding up to x amount of calories for a meal. You just have to brainstorm it to be what you want. But - eating very caloric food, which, when added up at the end of the day, give you more calories than your body is going to expend - you will get fat and stay fat.