nobe

Thanks, guys. Hope - he's two and a half. I think it's only happening because I was feeling smug, seeing all my "frenemies" from an old snobby baby group I used to go to complaning about what monsters their kids have become, haha.

It's definitely a vicious cycle where he acts up, I get mad, my anger makes him agitated, and so on. And I know he responds better when I whisper when he's being bad than when I yell, but I'm worn down at this point. It would probably help if I was getting more sleep. When I'm tired every annoying thing is like nails on a chalkboard. I need to stop ignoring my bedtime rule and put down the book/ get off the internet. But man, the quiet alone time has been so nice lately, it's hard to go to bed.

I'm also stressed right now because hubby's two older kids are coming to visit for an unknown length of time in a week, and without elaborating too much, their visits are always a nightmare, and it's always too much excitement for my kiddo even when he's not crazy. And I want to stay on track with my weight loss but it'll probaably mean using my phone for fitday because apparently my computer is only on loan from the kids until they come back and take over the house again. Sigh.

I'm going to have to really work at motivation this summer, and some days this thead is the only thing keeping me from eating the entire contents of the kitchen.

canary52

Nobe, I hear you about hanging onto this thread like a lifeline to stop the out of control eating.

Two and a half is very challenging without adding the extra kids and the stress they bring. And everything is more stressful on very little sleep. You are only human; do not beat yourself up as so many of we parents do. Try giving yourself a "time out" if you can, just to pull back a bit so you don't get overwhelmed.
I also get "superstitious" about being smug or being too happy with where my kid is at so that was something I had to shake my head and laugh, it struck a chord in me. SMH LOL. And to see that I was not the only one who had a snobby baby group; what is with some of these vicious, competitive mothers? What are they: mommier than thou? With their high tech toys and their superior "parenting skills"? Not that I'm bitter.
Also, you may NEED that down time reading or being on the computer to destress and have some of your own time before bed. I know I always did and still do. Maybe you need to hear Samuel Jackson read Go Th f*#! to Sleep. It is a modern classic. When my DD used to nap I spent the few few moments doing the Snoopy Happy dance. Unfortunately she gave up the nap before age 2. She was always a challenging child from word go (a breech birth.) She is my love my joy and my father's revenge on me all rolled into one VERY contentious and intense package.

You are not alone. Being a parent is a HARD job, sometimes requiring chocolate, sometimes just a nice hot bath. And the folks on FD help. They sure do.

nobe

Go Th f*#! to Sleep is my bible. I also like it read by Werner Herzog...the German accent makes it so menacing, haha.

Your kid sounds like my kid. A pain in the butt from day one, but also the joy of my life. He's generally pretty quiet and agreeable now (except the past few days), but when he's tired, watch out. And the first year with him I wanted to go back in time and get my tubes tied. SO miserable and screechy and horrible, constantly. I thought I'd made the hugest mistake of my life. Luckily it's gotten better.

When kiddo was a baby he was literally only sleeping about 30-45 minutes at a time, all night (reflux and an undiagnosed bladder infection). Since it takes me a long time to fall asleep, there were times I was awake for 48 hours + at a time. When I mentioned at the baby group that I had counted the night before and he woke up 14 times and I hadn't slept since the night before last and was ready to murder him (jokingly, obviously), one of the other moms piped up and said "my baby wakes up a lot too, but I don't mind, because I like spending time with him." That was one of the nicer things they said.

I keep them all as facebook friends so I can read about their antidepressant prescriptions and their full time nannies and how horrible their kids are, haha. And they've all gotten fat after making fun of my weight, so booyah! I'm super petty sometimes, haha.

catebert

Thanks so much for that Hope, I had a couple of miserable days and really felt like I was derailing all my good work the past month, but have managed to regroup so the week has not been a total loss!

You were asking about an alternate sweetener to use in the cheesecake. You can also use Stevia, but for best results you should use a stevia/FOS blend (stevia is super super sweet, with a bitter aftertaste, so it is usually paired with FOS – fructooligosaccharide – which is about ½ as sweet as sugar. It is a sugar, but has a molecule so large it passes through the human gut without being digested). There are several brands out there, if you google stevia/fos you should find lots of info.

Goals for this week:
<1400 calories: 1414, 1790, 1076, 1838, 1439, 1407, 1644
Net Carbs < 20: 33.4, 71.1, 17.0, 135.1, 47.0, 19.5, 23.5
Water >64(oz): 45, 50, 50, 60, 65, 50, 60
exercise: none, none, none, none, again-none, none, none

canary52

Omigod Go Th f*#! to Sleep read by Werner Herzog, that has got to be, as DD would say, epic. I MUST hear that.

Thank you, Cate, for the recipe substitute and the support and thank you Nobe for sharing.

I just had another great brain bleed of a phone call with the joy of my life; she's a good kid in a terrible situation with a really messed up friend and I am worn to a thread.

If I can give advice to a person with a young child (unless you have older kids, then you could probably give me advice): Don't worry about your kid being constantly happy, focus more on his coping skills for when he's not. Don't feed him sugar; it is, as Marilu Henner, would say, kiddie cocaine, pretty addictive for adults too. Unplug your tv (or only get basic cable; reality tv is brain poison tho sadly it did help my DD with an SAT essay) and don't hang out with bummer parents. Trust your instincts and stick to your guns; YOU are the parent. That's what I would do differently.

cjohnson728

Hope, your advice is a bowl of awesome.

I wish you guys lived near me. I think we all need to go out and have some skinny girl cocktails and commiseration .

Thanks for being here this weekend, though. Coming in and posting and reading really does keep me from flying off the rails.

canary52

Cassie, skinny girl cocktails and lots of `em. Oh, waiter, bring us another round of those low cal margaritas please. What'ya say, everyone, one more for that long long road?

I am just pretending to do this virtually cause, girls, we sound like we ALL could use `em. That and Cate's cheesecake!

And now I am off to watch Damages on Roku cause Glenn Close is one evil badass b&%#*h with great Annie Hall sunglasses and very little conscience and I need to have a role model.

nobe

Forgot to report yesterday and don't feel like doing it, but here's today.

1) 1,600 calories max/day (allow myself 1 guilt free day over 1,600) - 1406, 1519, 1467, 1328, 1908, 1416
2) do 2 exercises on days I don't work (walking/weights/gardening/Richard Simmons/stationary bike) - lots of walking, nothing offical, but I was cleaning the house and the yard for most of the day, lots of gardening and walking, lots of gardening and walking, nothing, stationary bike/nothing else official, but lots of running around the yard with the kid
3) 20% protein minimum - 25%, 19%, 25%, 23%, 24%, 20%
4) 64oz water minimum - not enough, 64oz, 64oz, 64oz, 80oz+, 64oz+
5) calorie deficit 700+ - 863, 1087, 1000, 1075, 332, 818
6) take vitamins - yes, no, yes, yes, yes, yes
7) lights out by 11 the night before - no, no, no, no, no, yes
8) no food after 8pm the night before - yes, yes, yes, yes, no, no

cjohnson728

Mixed results:

Health and Wellness:
1. 1300 calories or fewer 1296 lol, 1287
2. Eat clean. Yes, 90%...had some frozen yogurt
3. Exercise both days. Fail...poorly planned schedule, Yes
4. Drink water. Yes, Yes
5. Sleep at least 7 hours. Yes, Yes

Little Things I've Been Putting Off Forever:
6. Make progress on the carpet issue. Yes
7. Vacuum cat hair off the furniture. Yes
8. Change family pics in family room and staircase. Waiting on niece to edit with her program
9. Get new prescription sunglasses Yes

Work stuff:
10. Proof 2 reports. One
11. Write 1.5 reports. Done
12. Do two insurance auths. One
13. Revise report and send new version. Done

Didn't quite hit all my goals, but not too shabby. I had some lovely time with the hubby today and took the boy driving for an hour. I could keep working, but I'm going to go read for half an hour and then hit the bed. Choosing work over sleep and other things has not worked well for me these past few months; tomorrow is another day to get caught up.

canary52

1) 1650 cals max -1460
2) 8 glasses of water min -8
3) stretch- yes
4) walk or gym -long walk, maybe too long
5) 1 hour of any kind of writing minimum- yes
6) 500 words "real" writing -yes
I will also add
7) plan food: Yes
8) 5 fruits and veg: yes


See? I did great all... errr day

Hope these goals look good cause I'm gonna try em again this week

You guys rock!!!

big hugs,
Hope