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lcriswell0421 07-26-2013 08:20 PM

Trying again
 
Last year at about this time I had successfully lost 50 lbs of the 140 I wanted to lose. Then life happened. I fell into a bad depression and it's super hard to stay on an eating plan when you're severely depressed. Then when I pulled out of it I had lost all motivation to start again. So now here I am now, having gained back 52 lbs. I feel horrible. Look horrible. I can't breathe, move, etc. I started talking to a nutritionist again, and I told her that I don't think I can count calories again because the main thing I remember is feeling hungry ALL THE TIME. She suggested the plate method, but since I talked to her 1 week ago I've already GAINED 2 lbs. Obviously that is not going to work for me.

It's very frustrating, too, because a couple weeks ago I put my foot down and told my family that I am no longer going to buy packaged crap like chips and cookies. I've been buying fresh fruits and vegetables. Even with snacking less, I've still gained weight. I guess the problem is that I'm an excellent cook and I love tasty food.

Since counting calories has been the only thing that has ever worked for me in the past, I am going to have to do it, even if it means feeling hungry. I cannot continue being this huge.

I also need to find the motivation to exercise. I just can't seem to do it. I lost the first 50 with counting calories only. So maybe if I exercise and allow myself a few more calories I won't feel as hungry all the time.

Any encouragement would be greatly appreciated. I have a new goal date of 12/25/14. It would be a nice Christmas present for me AND my husband to buy something slinky.

bangkokjoy 07-27-2013 07:30 PM

Dear Lisa,
How's it going?
I read your testimony and I want you to know that you are not alone in your struggles with weight, exercise, and food. As I read, I thought, "Wow!", she's just like me! I hope you don't mind me saying that.
I'm so glad you are back managing your weight even if it is calorie counting. I have been successful counting calories in the past, too, but after I got the hang of it, I didn't count anymore... basically because I am not too much of a "variety" eater.
Today is July 27. That means you started yesterday. I wish you well, girl! I started yesterday, too, but didn't start to put anything on Fitday.com again until today. I've already reached my max in calories for the day and it's only 2 PM. For dinner, I plan to eat just plain raw vegetables with no dressings, so I should be OK.
My weigh-in is pretty much the same as yours... 249.
At one time, I had gotten down to 138 from 262! But that was accomplished in 2003, 10 years ago. Ever since then, I've ranged from 200 - 290 at my max. That was in January 2009.
Ever since 2001, I've been taking Juice Plus+ Garden, Orchard, and Vineyard blends as well as the Juice Plus+ Complete every day no matter how much I got off the bandwagon. It's been what has kept my BP, Cholesterol, and everything else about me in the healthy ranges. My BMI is right at 40 which is way too much but I do praise God for Juice Plus+.
In about 2 weeks, I fly back to China where I teach EFL and Intensive English in a new school in Shenzhen, just across the border from Hong Kong. I take a year's supply of Juice Plus+ with me when I go among all the other things teachers need to use in a school year. My eating there isn't any better than in the US... so much of the Chinese food is filled with oils of various kinds, and it's hard to get them to remove it when preparing you food in little restaurants and shops... mostly because I don't speak Chinese! So that's my dilemma there. And they do have sweet breads and chips and fast food and the list is endless. I work long hours at the school so the killer is when I am back at home in the apartment. It's already 6:30 pm and I'm tired from school not to mention carrying the extra weight. I still have lesson plans, grading, putting units together, and you name it for the school and my class, so the easiest thing for me to do is buy food that is already prepared, and it's all so oily... and it's easy to buy the junk food, too, which I do. Junk being mostly sweetbreads, fastfood sandwhiches, and Chinese fastfood which is full of carbs and oils, too.

And so has gone the last two years for me in China. One of the parents actually gave me a tread mill to use in my apartment but I'm so tired from evening school work that I don't get that done... either in the evenings or in the mornings. So, I've just got to be more determined this year! When I went out there in August 2011, I weighed 232. By Christmas break, I was down to 200! Then it happened again. I snapped. Christmas break I went to Thailand where I had lived for 15 years, and the food is so good there! It was a sad year in China for me and being with my friends and eating such delicious Thai food, and then returning back to China, put me in a real depression about where I was. Yet I've stayed because I believe that is where God wants me for this season of my life. It's up to me to learn how to cope and survive with health in that place!
Anyway, Lisa, I give you kudos for trying again. We just can't give up. We have to somehow change our mindset about ourselves so that when we taste success, we can stay there!
If you'd like to respond, I'd certainly like it very much.
I hope you do.
Christie


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