Hi funnygirl! I am in a similar boat. I can't say I'm fully perimenopausal yet, though it is probably just starting to knock at my door. I'm 43, married, and have one son, who's 14. I work outside the home, but I make my own schedule and can work at home a lot, so I'm usually only out working 1 1/2 or 2 days a week. I'm really lucky with that. I've been cooking more and more things from scratch lately; I've always done meals that way but have recently added other things, like bread, granola bars, pizza, crackers, etc. The more I know about nutrition, the more it makes sense, and I'm fortunate to have the time to do it. There is a cooking from scratch thread in the Foods section you could probably contribute a lot to!
Good luck with your 13 pounds. It's definitely do-able and everyone here is very supportive. If you have any questions or need anything, just ask! Check out some of the other threads and post wherever you find the inspiration! Welcome to FitDay!
And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good.