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Need to change before I'm dead

Old 12-08-2010, 08:43 PM
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Default Need to change before I'm dead

I'm 35. I've been fat all of my life, from when I was very young until now. This has been true for every year of my life with two exceptions, one of those exceptions being insignificant and the other being the result of one mere month of very hard work. I ate 1200c a day and trained regularly and lost a shocking amount of weight. I remember someone I hadn't seen in about a month telling me "You look like half the person you were!" I could do a pull up. I remember that best. I was at work, jumped up and grabbed a ceiling beam, and pulled myself up a couple times. It was a first ever. At that point in time I was about 255 to 260, on my way down. And then I stopped. I don't know why or what the reasons were other than life long habit and ritual, but I stopped eating well and working out. And now...

I am 35 and weight 347. I got on the gym scale earlier tonight and just couldn't f****g believe it. How did I get to 347? I sank. It mine as well be 400lbs and why even bother? But I got on the elliptical for 30 minutes and lifted heavy compound lifts for 30 minutes none the less, and was reminded of how terribly out of shape I am.

I have a dangerously large gut. I know the health risks. I already feel like s**t most of the time and my sleep is rarely restful. I feel BIG, in my house and car, at restaurants. I've often read forums and blogs where people wonder out loud how it is they could have gotten so out of control, and now I wonder it to.

And I wonder why I should even bother. Any kind of success is so far away. Even by drastic measures I'll only be 300 lbs by March. 300 lbs!

But I've got to do it because if I stay this way or get worse I'm dead and I know it. And even if I'm dead next year for some totally random reason, I want to experience some part of my life as a thin person.

I haven't weighed under 250 since early high school. I've lifted heavy and done martial arts on and off all of my life so I have something to work with. Now I wonder what's the best way to go about it.

My plan for the next month is to do something akin to the Velocity Diet. Low calories and low carbs for 30 days to get started, and while many may eschew this method I need a jump start and I need it badly. There's no way it can be more harmful to my health than the amount of fat I have on my body.

Any advice is welcome!

Last edited by 01gt4.6; 12-09-2010 at 05:51 AM. Reason: obscene language
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Old 12-09-2010, 12:39 AM
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I know exactly how you feel. I lost lots of weight a number of times starting when I was in my young 20's. I lost over 100 lbs, and I was feeling fantastic. I started going out and partying, and then bad habits took over. I gained everything back and more. Now I am doing this again, but I know I have to do this before my health bites me in the butt. I don't know why we fall back into these old patterns. Sometimes being thin and healthy is a lot more work than being fat, and I think I sabotage myself sometimes. I don't know why, but I am seeking counselling on this issue.

Anyways, good luck to your journey. Don't think of it as a journey for weight loss, more of a journey of getting your life and body back.
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Old 12-09-2010, 01:30 AM
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Welcome to FitDay! I feel your pain, man. Try being 46 and well over 400 lbs.

Anyway, that's where I was in May of this year. Today I'm still 46, but down to 310 lbs. and dropping.

My point is that you are NEVER too far gone to start living a healthier lifestyle and that big changes can happen fast.

We have a Unisex 100 pounds to lose thread on the Diet Tips part of the forum and you are welcome to join. Sometimes it's nice to talk to others who understand what it's like to be 100, 200 or more pounds above average.

Regards,
Michael

PS I'm not the FitDay police, but this IS a family oriented forum--don't want you to get busted for the language.
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Old 12-09-2010, 03:04 AM
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I can't give advice but how about some support?

And certainly, you have come to the right place; there are people here who can help support you in your goals.

Just wanting to do this is so positive. You want to live and be healthy. That's so important. You can do this. One step at a time.
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Old 12-09-2010, 05:28 AM
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Originally Posted by 2fatat35
And I wonder why I should even bother. Any kind of success is so far away. Even by drastic measures I'll only be 300 lbs by March. 300 lbs!

And if you don't you will be 347 (or worse) in March. If you can lose just 10 pounds a month then next Christmas you would have lost 120lbs and be lighter than you were in high school. Don't neglect undertaking a worthwhile goal just because of the time it will take, the time will pass anyway. (Another member has a quote like this in their signature.)

Here is my advise:
Commit to living the rest of your life healthy and fit.
You have lost weight before. You know how to exercise and control your calories. So why did you balloon back up to where you are now? Is it because you treated the symptoms and not the causes? Old habits die hard! Understand that you may need to track or monitor your food and execise for the rest of your life so you don't repeat the cycle. Is that such a high price to pay to be healthy and fit for the rest of your life? Have a plan after you reach your long term goals for maintaining your success. If you think you can return to your old habits once you hit that magic weight then you are setting yourself up to bounce right back to where you are currently.

The best diet plan is the one that works for you.
High Carb, low carb, high protein, low fat, paleo, vegetarian you name it and someone has had success and someone else failed. The key is finding a diet that fits you and that your body responds to. Educate yourself about nutrition and find the combinations that work for your body and that you are able to tolerate physcologically. Some use cheat meals, others find cheat meals as just an excuse to binge that sabotages their efforts. Some have foods that they will not eat, others feel deprived and end up binging if they can't have a treat now and then. If you can find a diet plan or book that works for you that is great but you will most likely apply tweaks and ideas from multiple sources to find the long term solution that you can live with for the rest of your life.

Check out Bodybuilding.com. They also have a wealth of information and information that you may relate to since you already lift. I especially like their Transformation of the Week series and in their forums they have a Fat to Fit thread with some great success stories and even pictures.

Welcome and good luck!
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Old 12-09-2010, 10:20 AM
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I can understand how you feel to some degree, at35. I ballooned at 18 from 125 lbs. to 175 lbs. in 8 months--as a 5'2" woman, that's a massive amount and I've gained about 35 lbs. since then. I've been trying and failing to lose the weight in the nearly 7 years hence and have had the same realizations as you: EVEN IF I DO THIS, I will only be at X weight in 6 months! I want so much to just lose everything and be slim and healthy INSTANTLY, but the weight piling on happened much faster than the weight will come off and it's only this year I've really come to accept that.

I have read that the more overweight one is, the more eager the body will be to start shedding pounds, and I think once you start another dedicated restriction of calories, you'll notice a difference quite soon. It won't be overnight. I wish it was. I think mecompco is a great role model for you--his advice is sound and he's made a great deal of progress in under 8 months after having started at a higher weight than you're at. I'm not saying your weight loss will have the same trajectory--who can predict how each individual's body will react?--but it's an example of what CAN change for you, from someone who's been in your shoes.

I hope that you can find it in yourself to try to lose the weight again. I also understand the feeling 'big' wherever one goes. I feel like I'm constantly judged for my own weight wherever I go, but it's nigh-impossible for those who haven't struggled with weight gain to understand how helpless one feels when it begins and how difficult habits are to change. It's definitely a great start that you find yourself here! Welcome and good luck to you.

J.
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Old 12-09-2010, 11:05 AM
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Hello! I can`t speak for everyone here but for me it was a lot of negative talk to myself that has been hindering my weight loss. I found out a couple years ago that I have a hormonal condition, one that made me put on over 60 pounds in 2 months. I thought back to how fit I USED to be, how easily the weight USED to come off...none of those things are true anymore and I found that I was putting myself down when things weren`t happening fast enough, even binging on huge amounts of food to fill the disappointment. Wich of course left me feeling horrible and guilty for not helping myself. I know the progress never seems good enough when you have so much weight to lose that you cant see an end in sight. But once you were in good shape and healthy and you absolutely can do that again. For me I had to put a lot of thought into why I kept sabotaging my efforts when I felt like I would do anything I could to get the weight off. Like you, I just want to feel comfortable in my own skin again, I`m missing out on so much of my life. Good luck to you, you have tons of support here!
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Old 12-10-2010, 05:18 AM
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I agree with you that a low (or very low) calorie diet is sometimes the only way to get started. 347 lb is not the end of the world, it's still fixable. Start today (or yesterday!) and even though it will take you some time to reach a healthy body weight, try to focus on a 10% decrease first, and then once you reach it move on. I'm sure you'll feel a lot better already at 300. We all need motivation and nobody can just pass it to us (I wish...); but if you find it you'll get there. Good luck!!
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Old 12-10-2010, 06:31 AM
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Hope the OP returns to read all the great advice you all have given!
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Old 12-11-2010, 11:26 AM
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Hi I am kind of in the same boat as you but im only 18 years old. I weigh 285 pounds and I am still in high school. To make a long story short....im fat and I feel like I always will be. I never felt pretty and I still have a lot of life yet to live. I want to live a healthy life and I want to feel pretty for the first time in my life. I know how you feel...dont think u are alone....cuz ur not...

Last edited by soccerchick101; 12-11-2010 at 11:29 AM.
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