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Old 08-26-2013, 08:11 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Hi Kathy! Absolutely we can keep in touch on this journey! I'm sorry it's taken a couple of days to respond. I work full time, have a family, and am in school working towards an advanced degree so I don't check the site everyday but certainly need to get in the habit of doing so. The more the merrier!

"I just turned 50 & NEVER liked much of myself"
You know what is really messed up about me and what I am realizing that may not be that out of the norm?? I have a really hard time coming up with things that I LIKE about myself. I have a laundry list of everything I can tell you that is wrong about me...from my looks, procrastinating, clumsiness, etc. etc. But I'm starting to realize that in this journey, if I don't start liking myself, I won't ever want to start "fixing" it, you know? We have to start accepting ourselves for where we are. Our friends and family do...so we cant be that bad, can we? I wore a new shirt to work on Friday (actually I had bought it a couple of years ago but it was the first time I had been able to fit into it in years). I thought about squeezing into some spanx and then thought about how miserable I'd be and about how nice it is to be able to breath during the day without them....so I went without. I didn't look perfect...I had bulges, but this is where I am now. I'm now 26 pounds smaller than where I was a few months ago and I need to be happy about that. I still have a way to go, but I'll focus on the positives for now.

I'll be happy to support you and anyone else as we continue on with our journey!
__________________
Age 41 5'3"
Started at 235.8 on May 29, 2013
Ultimate Goal: 125 by 12/2014
7/30/13 225.8
8/20/13 216.2
8/26/13 213.8
10/2/13 203
10/28/13 194.6
11/15/13 189.8
12/5/13 182
12/20/13 178.4
1/17/14 168
2/25/14 154.2
4/18/14 146.4
6/1/14 135

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I will rise from this defeat and claw my way back.

You don't have to be great to start. You have to start to be great.
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Old 08-27-2013, 03:25 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I forgot to post my latest results from my doctor. I had a follow up appointment last week and had a great visit. He was very pleased with my results saying I was doing better than he thought I would do....not sure how to take that but I'll go with it. My blood pressure was 124/72...or 122/74..either way a BIG drop from 185/150 a couple of months ago. I've had some dizzy spells which he thought was due to the BP meds so he has already cut that dosage by half!! For some reason I hate the thought of taking those meds so I'm so happy to reduce that dosage and he thinks I can eventually go off of them. He also finally cleared me for some exercise. I am to get in 3 hours of cardio per week and some light weights. I've been getting up at 4:45 in the morning to get on the treadmill and then follow up with light weights. Right now, I'm pretty tired while at work but I know if I can stick with it I'll continue to lose and get some energy. I cant exercise in the afternoon because I have a 2 year old and after being at work all day I feel the need to devote all my energy to her. by the time she goes to bed, honestly, I'm too tired to get in a workout at that point so the morning is it. I do feel better and the clothes are fitting better. I'd like to get down to 200 by October and I think I can do that, especially now that I'm excercising. We shall see....I have noticed I am more focused and getting more things done at work and at home. I was really in a funk and not feeling well enough to do anything at all. It's amazing how a much difference a couple of months can make!
__________________
Age 41 5'3"
Started at 235.8 on May 29, 2013
Ultimate Goal: 125 by 12/2014
7/30/13 225.8
8/20/13 216.2
8/26/13 213.8
10/2/13 203
10/28/13 194.6
11/15/13 189.8
12/5/13 182
12/20/13 178.4
1/17/14 168
2/25/14 154.2
4/18/14 146.4
6/1/14 135

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I will rise from this defeat and claw my way back.

You don't have to be great to start. You have to start to be great.
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Old 10-02-2013, 03:45 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default checking in with my progress

Well, I don't have many people posting but I see I'm over 700 views so I guess that means someone is interested in my journey so I'll keep on posting my progress for others to see It does keep me honest! Geez, I just looked and it's been over a month since I last posted so a lot has happened. I am officially down to 203 as of today. I was hoping to get to 200 by Oct. 1 but I'm not complaining. It was a lofty goal to start with and I'm happy with where I'm at. I keep reminding myself that this time is for life...it'll take a while to get it off so no hurry. My blood pressure is basically down to normal and I should be off the medicine by my next doctors visit. Praise god for that. I hate taking that stuff. Everytime I bend over or bend my knees to get something and then stand back up I feel like I'll black out. Come to find out the meds actually slow your blood flow to the muscles, causing the dizziness. Who knew?? At least that's what my doctor says. Hopefully that will stop once I get off of that medication. My doctor says I'm doing well with the weight loss and seems pleased. I just really started exercising about 2 weeks ago. I was supposed to start about 5 weeks ago and then got some "bacterial infection" that lasted about 3 weeks where I couldn't stop coughing, wheezing....all that fun stuff. Now I'm alternating between cardio and weights just to get started. Right now it exhausts me, I'm not even going to lie about it, but soon (hopefully) I'll start to feel the benefits of it and maybe even feel energized.

On a good/great note, I can actually wear the clothes in my closet again!!! I still have some smaller sizes I have stored away, but I'm back down to the sizes that I wore pre-pregnancy which is nice. Basically, I look like I have a new wardrobe so thats an added bonus. I still have a long way to go but I'm still going strong and starting to get compliments so that's always nice. Friends that are also struggling with their weight want to know what I'm doing so I've told them my whole story, right down to the miscarriages. It's funny, that is something that I couldn't even talk about before but now its somewhat cathartic. It's like I have to dump this toxic energy that used to weigh me down so I can continue to move forward. It's nice to see that I can motivate people. Me, ordinary me, can help motivate someone else. It's a good feeling.

As I'm shrinking, I've gotten rid of my clothes that are too big. I didn't even like the clothes I was wearing. I basically bought them out of necessity rather than style. For example, I bought this shirt because it would cover up my....everything...that was my necessity versus actually liking it. I've given the clothes to goodwill and have been able to pull out my smaller sizes. I have sizes going down to 4s and 6s. Just could't let them go, but this is the first time that I believe that I can actually get there again. I'm really shooting for next June but we'll see. I'm taking it month by month and day by day. Since I've been able to start exercising I'm really hoping to see some changes. Hopefully next time I'll be in the 190's!!!!! That is a big deal for me!
__________________
Age 41 5'3"
Started at 235.8 on May 29, 2013
Ultimate Goal: 125 by 12/2014
7/30/13 225.8
8/20/13 216.2
8/26/13 213.8
10/2/13 203
10/28/13 194.6
11/15/13 189.8
12/5/13 182
12/20/13 178.4
1/17/14 168
2/25/14 154.2
4/18/14 146.4
6/1/14 135

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I will rise from this defeat and claw my way back.

You don't have to be great to start. You have to start to be great.
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Old 10-02-2013, 09:10 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Your story is inspiring, and you are right lots of people are viewing but may not be posting. I was going to read and move on but thought I would stop and post a note to you to say GREAT JOB! You are awesome

I read all of your posts and can tell, simply by how you wrote your words that you have a sense of calm and acceptance - which will take you far! Keep on striving, you can do it! (talking to myself too! lol)
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Old 10-05-2013, 01:15 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Hi Jacklin! Thank you for sharing your story. I think I will ask my doctor about checking my hormone levels when I go back in Jan. As I seem to be stuck at 292. But my dietitian told me to keep up all the hard work I've been doing with journaling what I eat, as I do have goals set for minimum and maximum for, calories, fat, carbs, fiber, sodium, cholesterol, and protein. When I first saw my dietitian I was around 312 pounds, and with walking every day for 15 min. along with journaling for a healthy lifestyle class, I did get down to 287. I'm guessing 5 lbs really isn't looked at as a big deal. When they take my blood pressure I'm also high. 144/97 with a pulse of 109. For must people that would be something to worry about. But when I take using the stores monitories I do get readings of 128/88. My doc also ran an EKG test to make sure my pulse was just from anxiety. I also was diagnosed as a Type 2 Diabetic. This was catch with the A1C test as my fasting reading where always normal. My A1C came back as being 6.2 and as of this month I'm 5.5 Now my goal is to keep it there. In the past it would creep up to 5.7. Since the weather in my area is getting to cool be pleasant for walking, I'm doing Lessi Simons (not sure if I spelled her name right) 2 mile walk. It's about 35 minutes and it does get you sweeting.
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Start weight when starting tracking with fitday:
314- Nov. 28, 2011
Current weight:293-Dec. 14, 2013
Goal: 285

My Desirable weight: 125-160 (Lowest-Highest)

I'm just making lifestyle changes.

Wii Scale
3-29-2011 312lbs
3-30-2012 299lbs
4-2-2013 296lbs
2014
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Old 10-05-2013, 01:21 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Thanks astralmonkey for the kind words. I have to admit its taken me a while to grasp this self acceptance piece and sense of calmness of where I am but quite honestly I think a scary dr visit had to have shocked me into that reality. Whatever the reason, I am grateful for the new path it has sent me on.
__________________
Age 41 5'3"
Started at 235.8 on May 29, 2013
Ultimate Goal: 125 by 12/2014
7/30/13 225.8
8/20/13 216.2
8/26/13 213.8
10/2/13 203
10/28/13 194.6
11/15/13 189.8
12/5/13 182
12/20/13 178.4
1/17/14 168
2/25/14 154.2
4/18/14 146.4
6/1/14 135

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I will rise from this defeat and claw my way back.

You don't have to be great to start. You have to start to be great.
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Old 10-05-2013, 01:56 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Hi LMB! You must have been posting as I was just posting my previous reply. It sounds like we have some similar histories. My dr told me I was about one year away from being on medication for possible type 2 diabetes and my husband was already there although I'm happy to report that he is now off all medication after he joined me on this journey of healthy eating. All of his levels are normal so it is reversible IF you catch it early enough. When I went in, all of my hormone levels were high. The way he explained it was when we gain weight for whatever reason the body will create more estrogen. As women gain weight, we of course have more body fat... The more body fat you have, the more estrogen your body will hold onto making it even more difficult to lose body fat so it becomes this vicious cycle. In my case, my estrogen was so high, my testosterone levels had also started to climb (dr said) in my body's attempt to self regulate at get back to normal. So...if you can imagine I was tired, moody, thought I was depressed, possibly losing my mind, and it came down to my hormones. He actually didn't put me on any meds for that and said once I started losing the weight it would take care of itself and he was right. I wasn't able to lose any weight but one thing that really helped but wasn't easy...not even gonna lie... He wants me to eat 80% of my calories before 3:00. So I try to eat 5 times a day...at 7,10,12,3, and dinner at 6 or 7. No carbs at dinner, just a meat and veggie but I eat carbs during the day. It's worked for me, but I've had to get used to being hungry sometimes at night...not all the time but that was usually when I fell off the wagon if you know what I mean when I dieted before. I had to go through 3 doctors until I could find someone who would listen to me so good luck talking to your doctor. That has been life changing for me! Good luck!
__________________
Age 41 5'3"
Started at 235.8 on May 29, 2013
Ultimate Goal: 125 by 12/2014
7/30/13 225.8
8/20/13 216.2
8/26/13 213.8
10/2/13 203
10/28/13 194.6
11/15/13 189.8
12/5/13 182
12/20/13 178.4
1/17/14 168
2/25/14 154.2
4/18/14 146.4
6/1/14 135

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I will rise from this defeat and claw my way back.

You don't have to be great to start. You have to start to be great.
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Old 10-28-2013, 04:19 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Default latest progress report

I'm still making steady progress here and finally back into the 100's!!! I weighed in at 194.6 this morning. As far as sizes go, I think I was about a 22 and now I'm down to an 18 and a 16 in some brands. Shirts have gone from 2X/3X to XL. I was able to get into my old size 14 jeans but I actually like to be able to breath when I'm walking around during the day so I'll need to give it a few more weeks before I actually wear those babies for more than 10 minutes at a time.

I can't remember if I noted in my last post but I've hurt my foot so that has hurt some of my progress in cardio because I do like to walk on my treadmill in the mornings but what I've done is slowed the pace but added light weights every five minutes. So every five minutes I'm doing light weights to work on the arms to try to increase the heartrate a bit. I'm having to walk S---L---O----W so I don't re-injure the foot...probably shouldn't be walking at all but this seems to be working in the meantime. My arms need all the help they can get in the toning department so I'll probably stick with this even after the foot heals. I'm actually starting to feel stronger even with the use of these smaller weights.

It's funny, someone asked my if I had hit my halfway mark yet....I haven't even thought about that. I had to explain to them that this is a one day at a time kind of thing. Every day is a success for me that I can eat healthy and get some excercise in. I only stress myself out if I start thinking about how far I have to go. I still have a long way to go...I know that. BUT..I'm making progress and that's all that matters at this point.
__________________
Age 41 5'3"
Started at 235.8 on May 29, 2013
Ultimate Goal: 125 by 12/2014
7/30/13 225.8
8/20/13 216.2
8/26/13 213.8
10/2/13 203
10/28/13 194.6
11/15/13 189.8
12/5/13 182
12/20/13 178.4
1/17/14 168
2/25/14 154.2
4/18/14 146.4
6/1/14 135

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

I will rise from this defeat and claw my way back.

You don't have to be great to start. You have to start to be great.
jacklin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-28-2013, 05:47 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Good luck on your journey, Jacklin! I think the ways we regain what we lost are as important as the ways we lost pounds. Putting weight back on after you've lost it is so frustrating, but a common experience. Not to mention putting on weight after emotional milestones.

I was reading a book recently (wish I could find the title) in which the author pointed out that the desire to eat something for comfort, for snacking, or just to eat more calories, occurs some time before you actually make the attempt to even decide what to eat. After your boss gave you an impossible assignment, for example, and you aren't even thinking of food... suddenly, the word 'lunch' pops into your mind. Or 'grocery shopping,' or 'food cart.' He said that that was the time to start thinking about better ways to deal with the stress or boredom that prompted that thought. Right then, with some conscious follow-through. Of course, hunger prompts you to think about food, too.

This really hit home with me because I am a 'stress eater.' Not everyone is, but I sure am.
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Old 11-03-2013, 01:35 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Default Great job!!

Hi Jacklin, my name is Mary and I , too, have started on a lifetime journey. I have a thread under Motivation similar to yours, but you have been way more honest than I have been. I have had lots of trying times as well, but did not go into anywhere close the detail that you did. And, as you can see by your views, you are inspiring many others, including me. I am so jealous that you are down into the 100's again! I am 5'2" and weigh 235 pounds. My highest weight was about 5 years ago at 268. I have been off and on with my weight effort over the years. I am 62, so it is pretty hard to get it off. It is a good thing you are doing this now, before you get any older! Another difference is that I have never been at a normal weight as an adult. In high school, I was about 20 pounds overweight (and I thought I was really FAT!). In college, I hit 150 and was really disappointed in myself. So, over the years, I would gain and lose, gain and lose, etc. I became a single mom and continued my gain and lose habit. I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes 4 years ago and have been taking metformin since then. I once got down to 200, but could not get another pound below that before I started gaining it back! (Again, major disappointment with myself!) Anyway, my son is now in his 30's and he is the reason I am on this discussion board. He has been "nagging" me for years about my weight and overall lack of good healthy habits. But he actually recently got through to me because he was kind of like your doctor that told you like it really was, only my son didn't use medical terms. It was more about the family and what would happen if I died because I did not take care of myself. I have a granddaughter too, that I want to see grow up and get married and all of that. So I am working with him (I call him my coach), to stay accountable. It is hard because I am a very busy person, even though I am retired, and I don't like to spend all this time on the computer. But if it must be to stay motivated, then I am going to have to post on here more often. You have truly inspired me!
I would like to tell you about another website called Flylady.com. Fly means "finally loving yourself." Her name is Marla Cilley and she and her team help people get organized in every area of their lives, including weight loss. She helps people learn to love themselves so they will keep themselves healthy. There is way more to her than that, but you can learn more on her website.
I wish you the best and I pray that you will stay on your path of getting and keeping yourself and your family healthy! God bless you!
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