I'm sorry you feel so bad, and I admire you for keeping to it even though it is so hard. It does get easier.
Can you figure some distracting activity other than thinking about food? For me, really absorbing mystery stories help. For SIL it is odd craft projects (she once showed off a huge sequined Santa she had made, it was not to her taste at all, and I asked "how did you come to make that"? she said "by not eating).
I wish you the best in your journey !