Have you thought about getting a heart rate monitor? I find that mine is an invaluable tool. I can make sure I am in my target heart rate for however many minutes I want to be and it also calculates my calorie burn for each session. It provides a summary at the end of the week of time exercising, total calories burned, and time in each heart rate zone (low, medium, high), and it's all customized to my height, weight, and age. That's helped me identify what activities burn certain numbers of calories, as the estimates on Fitday and other sites are not always accurate for me.
You can pick hand weights up at Walmart or Target or any sporting goods store (1, 3, 5, 8, and 10 lbs. are the most readily available) and develop a strength training program to do at home. There is an old thread (I think in the Exercise section) entitled "Weight Training for Girly Girls" that I started in order to ask for help in doing that; there is some good advice in there. You can also check out the library for books that have sample programs, and I'm sure there are some on the internet.
And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good.