Not a dietician, a nutritionist, or an MD, but I can tell you what I've figured out in four months...however much that's worth!
Another poster here, Cassie, has made the allegory before that dieting is often akin to throwing something to the wall and seeing if it sticks. It's often, unfortunately, a trial-and-error process since you're dealing with a biological system (your body) that is unique to YOU -- no one else has your exact same body and internal states.
Different diets and strategies tend to work for different people. The first few weeks of weight loss often go faster for most, since you tend to shed a lot of water weight. Then it slows down. You can hit "plateaus" where you don't lose any weight at all, even if you've been sticking right to your numbers, and you have to shake up your routine to get your metabolism moving again.
This can mean adding/changing exercise (even just walking), or changing your "macros" -- that is, your percentages of carbs/protein/fat in your diet.
For example, when I first started dieting, I had VERY high carbs (60-70% per day) even though my calories were down, and I found that making a conscious effort to up my protein helped my body a lot. Now I aim for 30% of all of my calories consumed to be from protein -- it fills me up for longer, and in general I eat less. Sometimes I miss the mark, but that's ok, no one is perfect! I had started on a 50% carbs/30% protein/20% fat regiment a couple of months ago, and now I'm seriously thinking of changing it to 40/30/30 carbs/protein/fat because A) That's what my body seems to be responding to and B) having lower carbs is feeling good. 40/30/30 is a common regiment, but you can find what works for you too.
Also, how much water are you drinking daily? Water is very VERY important. It helps flush your system of sodium (which retains water and weight) and helps you more easily metabolize/flush fat. Plus, staying hydrated is awesome and important!
I hope any of this helps you at all, and I wish you good luck on your journey. You seem to be very conscious of what your'e doing and what goes into your mouth, and learning the caloric content is definitely a journey!
Female, 28 years old, 5'4 1/2" tall
Starting weight 1/4/11 = 215.2 lbs.
Weight 9/3/12 = 164.9 (net: -50.3 lbs.)
Current mini-goal: 160 lbs.
Next mini-goal: 150.2 lbs. <--- Official "Healthy BMI" weight
Estimated final goal: 130 lbs.
"You don't have to change your life today. You only need to change your day today."