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Old 05-09-2010, 01:18 AM   #4 (permalink)
traceymc1985
FitDay Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Leeds,England
Posts: 356
Exclamation

This is exactly what i tell myself. I hide all this from other people and my partner and kids are the only ones who see me upset which isnt fair on them. I am trying though. The reason i feel im like this is because every relationship ive been in (just a couple) and all the boys at school (some girls) have called me fat for a long time and this has stuck with me all my life. I suppose i find it difficult to believe that he doesnt deep down feel like that too. I do talk to him alot and he understands how i feel. Im thankful he doesnt get frustrated and is very patient with me. But i didnt want to drive him insane so i found fitday to help. Talking to others outside my everyday life may help to sort out little things in my head. You members always have the right words. Ive been treat very badly in past and this did a great deal of harm to my self-esteem. This did go away but has returned and i see myself in a whole different light. Im much more hard on myself and find faults much easier. I dont mean to be so depressive i am a really fun person at times just not as often. Im determined to work it out though. We've had 5 great years and im not throwing him or myself away just yet!!! Thankyou for listening
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