Join Date: Jan 2010
I don't even know what kind of diet your are on, but whether it is low-carb, high-carb, low-fat, high-fat, low-protein, or high-protein, you will find some forum on the internet where people say exactly the same things your husband says about 'that diet' and why it makes you fat. So, right off the bat, divorce the content of the message from whatever message your husband delivers. His whining is about something else.
I can give you a short easy method to rein in his barrage of criticism. Eating more calories than your body can 'burn' will make you fat. You can eat anything you want if you stay within a designated limit of calories. Unless your husband wants to back off, tell him that he can be in charge of weighing all the food you will put in your mouth and keeping a tally of your daily consumed calories.
If he doesn't want to do that, then tell him he's not willing to walk the walk, but you're tired of hearing him talk the talk. Tell him you need to control your calories and you can use his measuring and counting and reporting skills to do that. If he accepts this, it will shut him up fast and put him to work. Which should be fine for you. You WILL lose weight, then.
If he argues that it's not calories - it's something else that makes calories into something close to calories but not the really effective force that calories are - then he's got to pick a diet camp to squat in. If it's the 'calories don't count, carbs do' camp, let him help you eat 5,000 calories a day of saturated fat-laden red meat, steamed fish (no breading), or broiled chicken (no breading). You won't want to eat that many calories of such items, but you must - and you will appreciate the little bit of watery veggies you can be allowed. Don't forget to take the supplements you will need because your diet will be deficient in various vitamins and minerals (ask your doctor - he can give you a list).
But at 5,000 calories worth of protein and fat, you will gain weight. When you have gained that weight (remember, you have to stick to this diet every single day, which means you won't be socializing that much), then you and he can go on to the next diet.
Eat 5,000 calories worth of non-fat or low-fat items every day. It will taste better, because there will be more variety. But, 5,000 calories is 5,000 calories - every day, remember - and you will gain weight. Then you and he can go on to the next diet.
Eat 5,000 calories of vegetables, dairy, grains, fats and fruit. It's vegetarian, so there are a few vitamins you will be short (B12 comes to mind) but you will have to make an effort to get enough vegetable protein (soy and whey come to mind). Still, with 5,000 calories every day, you will gain weight.
Eventually, with your whiny husband keeping track, if you have eaten 5,000 calories worth of each diet, faithfully (no fair cutting calories!), you will realize you actually can eat all of those things in all those diets, together, but only X amount of calories as your daily limit. It can average out over 2 or 3 days, but it has to be within that limit - which you decide. If the limit is too high, lower the limit. You will lose weight.
This will shut your husband up because it will keep him busy. This will satisfy your goal of losing weight because you will lose weight.
Most important, you will have sabotaged your own goal of losing weight by eating too many calories (over the limit) of whatever some diet guru told you was safe to eat plenty of. When you see the consequences, you will join the ranks of all dieters who have tried the multitude of diets that people try to sell you (whether it's a book, or a bar, or a drink, or a prepared meal).
'Eat all you want!' is a sly way of saying, 'You can eat ALL you want because you won't want to eat much of this after a short while, yet you are prohibited from eating more than X amount of some other 'bad' food.... Don't be frustrated, it's all good.... You'll be able to eat more of the bad food later.... etc., etc.
Once you've self-sabotaged by ignoring calories, you won't make that mistake yourself again. By making your husband your chief counter and measurer, you make him a witness. He won't likely try to foist diet-speak on you again.
Last edited by Kathy13118; 07-21-2013 at 04:10 PM.